Quote:
Originally Posted by crich70
I put in some suggestions for changes in ( )'s. I'd leave off the length entirely as an estimated length will be in the description anyway and most people expect a short story to not be overly long in any event.
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Your changes reflect a decided change in implicit meaning, which may not be what she intended.
Your way says the princess is forced into the only action available to her, and in her world, dragons eat princesses.
The original way suggests that she has full freedom to decide what to do, and while people SAY dragons eat princesses, our self-guided princess might follow a path that leads her to a different fact....
And I'm not sure that one reads better then the other anyway.
I don't think your last sentence reads well. My editing reflex always questions the addition of "which" and in this case I agree with the reflex.
And "these" in Becca's blurb refers to the stories in this collection. Not just "one of those things."
ApK