Quote:
Originally Posted by montsnmags
Dear Dr. Bad Advice,
I recently downloaded a whole lot of pirate ebooks from a link someone sent me. Now I really love that there are so many pirate ebooks available, but when I mention it here, some people look at me nastily with suggestion that I am contributing to terrorism and that I probably have close relations with livestock. I don't think this is fair at all. I really enjoy downloading pirate ebooks. I mean, Treasure Island is an absolute classic, and, sure, I've also got some children's ebooks, like Pirate Pete, but surely that would only make me prone to mockery and derision, not moral outrage. Admittedly there is also the How To Be A Pirate, but it is purely for reference and comparison in relation to the assorted pirate biographies I own.
Regardless, I think their judgement of me because of my pirate ebook collection is totally unfair. Do you think they're being unfair? How can I respond to their discriminatory and judgemental contempt?
Also, how does a gas barbecue work?
Signed in my own blood, with many an "Arrrr, me maties!"
Captain Grayscalebeard
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Dear Captain “Arrrr, me maties!” Grayscalebeard:
I thought I told you not to let anyone know I gave you that Torrent address!
Well, let me try to give you some better bad advice:
I can understand your frustration. Basically, however, you have nothing to worry about unless you start wearing tights and feel a strong desire to sing and dance. If you do feel a need to wear tights, try to accessorize by “wearing silver-buckled slippers and tight shiny pants” while you read [Ray Stevens/The Pirate Song]. Also, when dressed in that outfit, try to avoid any club where motorcycles are present.
Now for the bad news:
I’m afraid that if you continue to download books then I will be forced to ban you. Not for the downloading of books, mind you,
but for your incredibly bad taste in reading material.
“But that’s stupid,” as one 16-year-old remarked on this site recently. Yes, indeed it is stupid. But only a 16-year-old would say it. You will never hear me saying that.
As for your other question, once the criminal has been gassed, the excess gas is then filtered in a
clever way to avoid any contamination, whereupon the remaining gas is then vacuum-bottled into an adjoining room and promptly shipped to Wal-Mart for popular consumption in home environments. Remember:
Gas, a Better Way to Live.
You can obtain more information from this torrent address. (But don’t tell anyone.)
http://www.TorrentsBeGone@BarbieDollsRUs
Signed,
Dr. Bad Advice