[Prestidigitweeze]

My apologies to anyone I might have offended with the phrase consumer's ocular chew toy. Under normal circs, I might have tempered the language so as not to imply that anyone who happened to like the current Mini was a mere consumer.

I was too amused to remember that because I couldn't stop picturing the following image: people leaning over their seven-inch tablets as their eye membranes parted to reveal pointy iron teeth, which would then begin chewing on said tablets' Retina screens.

You might call that an i for an eye.