THANKS y'all... based on your input I came up with :
(Mike does not believe in God, and Sarah is not human, so needed some tweaking...
)
When I entered sickbay, Sarah was sitting up and sipping on a cup of water. Seeing her awake brought smile to my face and a lightness to my step.
“Sarah!” I rushed to her ignoring the medical equipment all around her.
“Mike!” Her fury face suddenly lit up with a smile that caused my heart to quicken.
I pulled her into my arms, and held her body tight against mine. Nothing else mattered in the whole universe right then. Sarah was alive! Her slight moan of pain reminded me that I needed to be gentle. As I eased her back I gazed in to her big green eyes and asked, “How are you doing?”
“Oh, fine. A bit drained is all.” Her face betrayed how tired she really was, but she would never let on.
I still have the "he said/she said" habit to break. Grrr. Probably still needs grammar/smoothness tweaking, but for a first cut I think its far superior to what I had. I probably should add some romance to my reading since I have several romantic sub plots.