[Daithi]

Two brothers, ages 5 and 8, sit down at the breakfast table one morning.

Alex, the older of the two boys says, "Tommy, I was over at Billy's house yesterday after school, and he cussed right in front of his mom. She didn't do anything. He says he does it all the time and never gets in trouble. He says you have to train your parents. He says you can't just let them set all the rules. You have to stand up for yourself. So, I've decided that you and I are going to say a cuss word right in front of Mom. I'm going to say God damn and you say ass. Ok?"

"All right, but you have to go first," says Tommy.

Alex and Tommy's mom comes into the kitchen and says, "What would you boys like for breakfast this morning?"

"Make me a bowl of some god damned Cheerios," says Alex.

Alex's mom went ballistic. She snatched him up out of his chair before he could even blink. She wrenched him up into the air by his arm, so that he was on his tippy toes, and then she went to town spanky his backside with one of her shoes. He did a little dance as he tried unsuccessfully to get even higher on his toes and out of the way of that shoe smacking his butt.

"Oww! Oww! I'm sorry Mom! Stop! Oww!" he cried.

"You get your fanny up to your room!" yelled Alex's mom, and as soon as she let go of his arm he made it his mission to get out of that kitchen and up to his room as soon as possible.

Alex's mom, still quite clearly upset, took a deep breath then turned to Tommy. "What would you like for breakfast?" she asked.

Tommy stammered, "I'm not sure, but you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios."