Thread: Bad Karma, A Hard Boiled Crime Novel
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Old 03-24-2012, 05:36 PM   #9
hard-boiled pat
The Night Was Moist
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
I read this and enjoyed it - up to a certain extent.

I think you have a real flair for writing, what I consider to be a real talent.

The issues that took away from my enjoyment are huge and not easily fixable, except for a revisioning of the work (which you, understandably, may not wish to do, since you feel it is a finished work).


1) The hopping/time jumps were jarring. (Organizational issues.)

2) The delineation of time (hours/minutes) simply got in the way of the story, and seemed unnecessarily cumbersome.


My reactions may differ from other Readers' reactions; however, these are my reactions on a story that had some wonderful writing in it.




Thank you,
Don


Thanks for the compliment Don! And I appreciate the critique... my next book doesnt have any jumping around. I originally wrote this one with a straight-ahead timeline but i felt it took too long to get to the action, so i dropped the first part back.

Thanks again for reading it!
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