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How the Internet Began
In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of
Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name
of Dot. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and
long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.
And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel
so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade
without ever leaving thy tent?"
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle
bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums
in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and
they will reply telling you who hath the best price. And the sale
can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony
Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her
way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an
immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the
top price, without ever having to move from his tent. To prevent
neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were
saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers
knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS),
and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures
- Hebrew To The People (HTTP).
And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the
greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic
Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and
the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real
riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother
William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land.
And indeed did insist on drums to be made that would work only
with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.
And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being
taken over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of
Ezekiel , or eBay as it came to be known. He said, "We need a
name that reflects what we are."
And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they
named it YAHOO Dot Com.
Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic
Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's
drums to locate things around the countryside. It soon became
known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).
That is how it all began.
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