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I guess you've never been a teenager, or worn a bulky coat, or been a member of a minority group, such that you aroused the suspicions of the store personnel the second you walked into the store. Because if you had, you would know how demeaning it is to be treated like a potential criminal.
In any case, your analogies aren't on point. The store is taking precautions to make sure you bought the merchandise; once it's paid for, that's the end of the store's interest. DRM is something that inhibits the customer after the sale is concluded--after the customer has fulfilled his or her obligation to the seller.
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Actually, I've been all three of those things-at the same time, even. I agree that the analogy isn't perfect-because there are no perfect analogies. OTOH, there are many products where the law regulates what you do with the product after you buy it-from guns and cars to children's toys.
Where we agree is that copyright infringement is a serious problem. There, you are at least ahead of those on this forum who apparently view it is as kind of a joke. Where we disagree is that you don't like DRM because you think content creators should repose total trust in you not to break the law. In your case that's deserved. Unfortunately, there are knuckleheads who f*** it up for the rest of us, and it is toward those that DRM is aimed.
To the example of minority youth being harassed by store personnel, the solution is better trained store security, not NO store security.