[Dr. Drib]

We should not be surprised by his attitude. After all, Indy writers do share certain traits (such as abundant nose-hairs, bullet-shaped heads, and attitudinal issues usually revolving around a latent mother love/hate complex).

However, there is much to be said about Indy writers and Indy novels. Below is a forthright appraisal of Indy writers written by Homer: *

"Typically, Indy novels are ignored by the mainstream and by Republicans. Since I am an Indy author, I thought it incumbent upon me to educate the ignorant masses about the importance of this often misunderstood renaissance in publishing. Usually, Indy novels are written by burbur salesman, maintance engineers, fast-food vendors, out-of-work booksellers, topless dancers and Congressman (the latter two often in collaboration), in addition to other types of malcontents – individuals much too numerous to mention in this flash bio-history. Most importantly, Indy writers reflect the diverse interests of a concentrated group of naive renegades and rednecks currently dominating the Indy marketplace, whose maturity-profile most often mimics pre-pubescent teens skilled in the art of denial. Too, Indy novels often have tipos and speling errors in abunndance, due to poor proof-reading skills and/or downright laziness."


* This extract is by Hiram Homer, a self-evidenced writer currently attempting to market his magnum opus, "Slime Ball," an Indy novel about a giant slug who likes to visit strangers' homes, while leaving a wide patch of slimy residue across carpets and beds. Called by one reviewer (Homer's Uncle Bert, for example) as "disgusting and a perversion, and not worth readin' at all," and then added, "If it was a duck, I'd shoot it, just to get it outta its misery." (Uncle Bert has himself been called a perversion and disgusting, so take his review with a grain of salt.)

My point (and one that Homer warns us about) is that Indy writers are a disturbed group, and we shouldn't pay them no mind at all. Rather, we should listen to the mature comments of (for example) Anne Rice.



Don