Quote:
Aaron Taylor is a man with nothing left. A shell of who he was, bereft of the woman he loves, he accepts an undercover assignment on the behalf of the Epsilon Alliance: to head into neutral territory to join the Resistance in their fight against the encroaching Drilin Imperium. On the border between two galactic powers, Aaron struggles to forge a new life and identity as he tries to undo some of the wrongs done by his father, an Imperium general.
Caren Flannery is the girl that Aaron feared he'd lost forever, and when she comes back into his life after escaping from Imperium custody, she brings with her some of the very darkest secrets the Imperium has. They are secrets worth killing for....
Together, these two Alliance SpecOps officers must find a way to keep themselves--and the greatest leaders the Resistance has--alive. If they fail, all of humanity may pay the price.
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I don't know anything about your story thus far, but you've received some pretty good advice. I agree with the whole tease the conflict, not the narrator blurb. Unless you're writing about a zombie PI or something, the character doesn't matter that much in the blurb. The strength of your text seems to be in the conflict. You really should stress that and the mysteries this girl has.
Here's my take on it.
Quote:
The Epsilon Alliance is fighting a war they cannot win. As the Drilin Empire creeps closer to the borders, Aaron Taylor struggles to forge a new life from the ashes of his past.
But, one night his past catches up with him. Now Aaron finds himself undercover in the heart of the conflict, working with the girl he gave up for dead [eleventy] years ago.
Together, they must find a way to keep the Resistance alive. If they fail, all of humanity may pay the price. Because Caren holds a secret.
A secret worth killing for.
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Hack away!
