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I don't know about writers, but from a reviewer perspective--go ahead with the three stars. As long as you're being informative and alerting the target readers that this books has X, and this book doesn't have Y, your review is useful. Reviews aren't ego-strokes for the writer, they're primarily helpful information for other readers. As a reader, most of the time, it's books with 5 star reviews (especially from people's author friends) that turn me off... because it means that no real readers are interested in the book! Real readers give a mix of stars, and that's okay, because it means that the book is reaching more people beyond the author's personal network. The more perspectives there are on a book, the better.
There's a lot of people who hate my favourite book of all time (Gabriel Garcia Marquez' One Hundred Years of Solitude). And that's okay, because it's still a five star book for me. And over time, a good book *should* find its way to its target audience--who will give it 4-5 stars.
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