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I say we collaborate on a Romance, right here. Hmmm, pies, Vera... I'll start:
Ol' Harv first noticed Vera at the pie eatin’ contest at last year’s county fair. Folks had always told him he had a good eye for livestock, and he nearly choked on his hog call when he caught the glare off her sweaty bosom as she came up outta’ that cherry pie for breath. He’d won the hog call championship three years a-running, but the way she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, flinging cherry filling and pie crust away into the shimmering summer air, plum took his breath away. Harv’s mind cast back to that day as he and Vera made love on the bathroom floor. The sound of her love-slick backside as it squeegied across the linoleum, put all his hog-calling efforts to shame, he thought, panting.
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