Quote:
Originally Posted by SneakySnake
We have just been on the phone with a lovely man called Marc. He is going to monitor our phone and internet for dropouts.
I wondered afterwards whether he was from montsnmags enterprises!
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Not as far as I am aware, though you should realise I have a fractured, distributed state of awareness and frequently answer the phone to calls for assistance from myself.
Just in case it is me though, then I assure you that
Diethyl Ethernet Industries (a wholly owned subsidiary of
Montsnmags Enterprises) stands by its product 100%...literally...our data risk management plan involves mirrored copies not only of all infrastructure, but every employee. To offset the cost of doubling our Human Resources budget we have extracted each employee's evil twin from this particular universe's mirror universe and, with the help of the skilled hoard of undead that is our legal team, obtained declarative judgements that we only have to pay each pair once, as they are the same person (evil/good attributes aside).
Your local phone and internet connection is 100% guaranteed from all non-Lovecraftian dropouts, though if you start to hear strange, deep utterances of the word "ZUUL" coming from your fridge, we recommend disconnecting at the wall socket.
We are grateful to have you as a customer, and hope you enjoy your service. Should you have any further enquiries, please contact the provided Squirrel Support number, and eleventy, small, furry, IT technicians (dressed in the usual "pirate-ninja" attire) will instantly appear within your living room to resolve and eradicate your complaint...err, problem.
Diethyl Ethernet Industries
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn"
NOW WITH MORE TENTACLES!