[jbcohen]

Sometimes I will start screaming at the top of my lungs in Hungarian or Polish. Now I don't speak those langeuges but translate.google.com does.

Frequently I will put on my best imitation of a little child and in the middle of their speach I will exclaim "Mommy my diaper is dirty."

Sometimes in the middle of their speach I will open my mouth and stick the reciever as far down as I can and I will say "Ahh."

I'll often go out to the livigroom where my son's toys are go get his toy chopper. I'll go back to the phone and start the chopper, after a few minutes I'll stop the chopper then exclaim into the phone "Oh look the aliens have landed."

Frequently I will exclaim into the phone "You have reached the American Institute for the Insane and Sexually Active head of the classs here."

"Johnny put the gun down, no you don't wear guns around your neck like a necklace and don't pull that trigger and no that gun is not a jet pack." The point here is to make them think your really wierd. We don't have any guns in the house.

Had one call selling phone services, I put on as innocent a voice as I possibly could and said "Phone, whats a phone? Mater of fact who am I? What's this shoe I'm talking on".

A man called while I was watching a movie selling aluminum siding for homes, I put the phone down so that the reciever was exposed went across the room and yelled "Charge" Then I yelled it in Arabic. Again translate.google.com speaks arabic I don't.

"You have reached the Washington Home for the Mentaly Insane, worst possible case scenario speaking."

Once I got really strange and quoted a passage from the Catholic bible, the Koran, the hebrew scriptures then the hindu upinshades. I continued by rotating between all four holly books quoting each in turn.

Once I looked on the internet and got a list of twenty of muslim curses then when the telemarketer called I would quietly read them quietly in the background pausing between each to call the telemarketer an infidel.

When I get telemarketers on the phone I try to be as wierd as possible you can't imagine how fast these things get rid of them.