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Right front pants pocket: keys, nail clippers, Chapstick, four USB sticks, loose coins
Left front pants pocket: cellphone, passwords reminder between two refrigerator magnets
Left hip pocket: wallet
Right hip pocket: nothing
Shirt pocket: pen, pencil, folded To Do list and notes
Super-secret-special-hidden-men's-stuff-compartment: tickets to the next big game, twelve old lottery tickets, Swiss army knife, an unidentifiable part from an old car, the grocery list my wife once foolishly trusted me with, two condoms (unused), one empty beer can, and half a cold pizza
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