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Actually, it was a case of I allowed myself to get furious, yelled at him, then felt better. We had it out last night after I posted, and I feel much better.
The 'I decide' part was I knew I would get over being hurt and mad, but I was dwelling on it too much to allow myself to feel better. I HADN'T forgiven him at that point, so I wasn't just rubbing it in. As I told him, even if I trust him to not take things further, it takes a little time to rebuild the trust he broke.
Anyone heard the country song that says "I just want to be mad for a while"? That's how I felt, but realized it was hurting me more than him. So I yelled, he argued back, I argued some more, then we both felt better (at least I did, I think he did, too).
I don't care if he talks to her now, as long as he doesn't erase evidence and will show me what was said if I ask.
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