[DMcCunney]

And another Soviet era joke:

Mrs. Petrovitch calls her son Ivan to the kitchen. "Yes, Mama?" he says.

She opens her purse and hands him money. "Here is 70 kopeks. Go to the newspaper kiosk. Get Isvestia for me, Pravda for your father, and Cosmonaya Pravda for your self."

"Yes, Mama!", says Ivan, and scampers off to run the errand. On the way out the door of his building, he runs into his father. "What are you doing?", asks papa. "Mama gave me 70 kopeks to get the newspapers!", replies Ivan.

"You tell Mama we don't need newspapers. We have the radio!", and he takes the 70 kopeks to go and buy a shot of vodka.

Ivan returns empty handed. "What happened?", asks mama. "On the way out I met Papa.", says Ivan. "He said we don't need newspapers because we have the radio, and he took the money to buy vodka!"

Mama sighs and opens her purse again. "Here is 50 kopeks.", she says. "Go the the newpaper kiosk and buy Isvestia for me and Cosmonaya Pravda for yourself." "But Mama", says Ivan. "What about Papa?"

"What about him?", she snorts. "Let him wipe with the radio!"
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Dennis