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morriss003 · 09-24-2010, 02:44 AM

Aloha,
Still working on Amy's Hero. Messed up the timeline and spent months staring helplessly at the screen, trying to decide whether to abandon it or try to fix it. Finally buckled down and fixed it. Up to 25K words now. Rewrote parts of Surviving the Fog. Found a major screw up. Fixed that. Added lines to make the actions of one of the girls more sensible.

Here is some of Amy's Hero.
"Amy ventured out of the apartment that day. She walked along the upper landing several times. Then she went back into the apartment.

There were people on the street. Most were getting into their cars, or getting out of their cars. A pregnant mother with two small children was sitting in her tiny yard across the street. She was reading while keeping an eye on the two noisy children. An older man was watering the yard in the apartment complex next to Amy's. All of them ignored Amy. In the late afternoon, before Joe arrived home, Amy crept down the stairs and stood on the sidewalk in front of the apartment complex. She stood there for almost half an hour before giving up and hurrying back to the apartment.

Joe came in a few minutes later feeling dusty and tired. His muscles, unused to the effort that they had been put through, were aching and complaining. Amy saw immediately how he was feeling.

"You could take a hot shower," she suggested. "Then we'll have dinner."

"That sounds like a plan," responded Joe gratefully.

Amy was cooking spaghetti. It wasn't too hard she realized, except that she kept checking every thirty seconds to make sure that the spaghetti had not gotten too mushy. Joe had forgotten to shut the bedroom door, and Amy heard the water running as she drained the spaghetti into a plastic colander.
The meatballs were simmering in a pot next to the spaghetti. Any did not hear the water running any longer, so she turned off the stove and went to tell Joe that dinner was about ready.

Joe was standing in the bedroom facing away from her, and he was wearing only a towel. As she started to speak, Joe dropped the towel and reached for a pair of briefs that were lying on the bed. Amy stopped abruptly. She blinked once and then again. Then silently she backpedaled until she was in the kitchen again. The vision of Joe's backside remained with her."

09-24-2010, 02:44 AM	#566
morriss003 Evangelist Posts: 438 Karma: 3409790 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Maui Device: kindle	Amy's Hero Aloha, Still working on Amy's Hero. Messed up the timeline and spent months staring helplessly at the screen, trying to decide whether to abandon it or try to fix it. Finally buckled down and fixed it. Up to 25K words now. Rewrote parts of Surviving the Fog. Found a major screw up. Fixed that. Added lines to make the actions of one of the girls more sensible. Here is some of Amy's Hero. "Amy ventured out of the apartment that day. She walked along the upper landing several times. Then she went back into the apartment. There were people on the street. Most were getting into their cars, or getting out of their cars. A pregnant mother with two small children was sitting in her tiny yard across the street. She was reading while keeping an eye on the two noisy children. An older man was watering the yard in the apartment complex next to Amy's. All of them ignored Amy. In the late afternoon, before Joe arrived home, Amy crept down the stairs and stood on the sidewalk in front of the apartment complex. She stood there for almost half an hour before giving up and hurrying back to the apartment. Joe came in a few minutes later feeling dusty and tired. His muscles, unused to the effort that they had been put through, were aching and complaining. Amy saw immediately how he was feeling. "You could take a hot shower," she suggested. "Then we'll have dinner." "That sounds like a plan," responded Joe gratefully. Amy was cooking spaghetti. It wasn't too hard she realized, except that she kept checking every thirty seconds to make sure that the spaghetti had not gotten too mushy. Joe had forgotten to shut the bedroom door, and Amy heard the water running as she drained the spaghetti into a plastic colander. The meatballs were simmering in a pot next to the spaghetti. Any did not hear the water running any longer, so she turned off the stove and went to tell Joe that dinner was about ready. Joe was standing in the bedroom facing away from her, and he was wearing only a towel. As she started to speak, Joe dropped the towel and reached for a pair of briefs that were lying on the bed. Amy stopped abruptly. She blinked once and then again. Then silently she backpedaled until she was in the kitchen again. The vision of Joe's backside remained with her."