Honest this happened for real, cross my wotsit and hope it falls off.
I was standing beside the father of the groom at a wedding. The bride was quite attractive, the groom was decidedly unattractive. The groom's father enquired, "What does she see in him? I know he's my son, but what is it?"
To which I replied. "He has a ten inch tongue and can breathe through his ears."
The father nearly wet himself, the whole congregation looked at us, of course I remained impassive, with a concerned look on my face.
