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mmmmm, I thought, as I rubbed my chin and thought, gladly, that the 3 day old beard had helped soften the blows; "that was not playing fair", I mused to the poor representative of the anatidae family (no way was I getting thoaqued for something else!).
Just then, up jumped a natterjack toad, leaving a pool of dank squalid putrid gunk on the carpet, the remnants of which were pooled and draped onto my lap; he (or she - being PC here) held in their paw (hand, foot, appendage) a key .....
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