Read, Opie Percival: The Jucklins. v1. 20 Apr 2015
 

Opie Percival Read (born December 22, 1852, Nashville Tennessee; d. November 2, 1939, Chicago Illinois) was a prolific American journalist and humorist. His bibliography lists 60 published books.

Excerpt
The neighbors and our family began to laugh at me about as far back as I can remember, and I think that the first serious remark my father ever addressed to me was, “Bill, you are too lazy to amount to anything in this life, so I reckon we’ll have to make a school teacher of you.” I don’t know why he should have called me lazy; I suppose it must have been on account of my awkwardness. Lazy, why, I could sit all day and fish in one place and not get a bite, while my more industrious companions would, out of sheer exhaustion of patience, be compelled to move about; and I hold that patience is the very perfection of industry.