Unutterably Silly Is chicken soup an abomination?

[AprilHare]

Originally Posted by poohbear_nc

We'll be over with the house tonight! It eats a lot too! People mainly!

Be careful poohbear_nc - he's planning to fatten us up!

[SameOldStory]

Not true. Not true.

Woe is to me! What'll I do. What'll I do.

SAY. Would like some barbecue sauce with your corn?

I'll even show you the secret barbecue recipe if you promise never to tell anyone.

Heck, come on over, without that vicious Baba Yaga dude. You don't need him, we're friends just having a tasty barbecue.

I'll even give you the barbecue sauce! How’s that. You'll have enough to cover your entire body.

[poohbear_nc]

Originally Posted by SameOldStory

Not true. Not true.

Woe is to me! What'll I do. What'll I do.

SAY. Would like some barbecue sauce with your corn?

I'll even show you the secret barbecue recipe if you promise never to tell anyone.

Heck, come on over, without that vicious Baba Yaga dude. You don't need him, we're friends just having a tasty barbecue.

I'll even give you the barbecue sauce! How’s that. You'll have enough to cover your entire body.

I know your type. First its nice sauce to prevent sun damage to the skin. Then it's the offer of time on the tanning bed. Then a bowlful of croutons for a snack! Before you know it - you've been basted, stuffed, and served as the entree of the day!
Nay nay - you'll need to be cleverer than that! I've been eluding voracious MR members for months! I know ALL the warning signs of impending doom and dinner!

[SameOldStory]

How can such a young bird be so tough? I'm just going to have to "tenderize" him first.

OK, OK. I give up. You are too smart for me. You know that I was jut kidding anyway. Just having some fun is all.

Hay, you wana go to the gym and lift some weights? That would be fun, right?

I'll spot you so you don't get hurt. And then you can spot me. Thats fair.

But we have to go before the Saturday barbecue, so lets get moving.

[kindlekitten]

ever notice how the two in resident chickens are REALLY species confused? we have a bear that thinks it's a chicken that thinks the sky is falling and a rabbit that thinks it is a chicken that needs to have an hourglass figure.

I'm tellin' y'all! the toxins in chicken just are NOT healthy!

[SameOldStory]

But how about if I ummmm do it myself?

Are you two guys clean living?

It's not me asking. Kindlekitten wants to know.

You can tell her and I won't listen. Honest.

[kindlekitten]

Originally Posted by SameOldStory

But how about if I ummmm do it myself?

Are you two guys clean living?

It's not me asking. Kindlekitten wants to know.

You can tell her and I won't listen. Honest.

won't work. I don't eat chicken. ever. at all. only eggs

[SameOldStory]

Hmmm

What's your opinion about snakes. Are they good to barbecue?

Of course there's only one snake that comes to mind. Hmmm

Naw. Too small.

[v1k1ng1001]

Of course a lot of the reason why chicken is so awful has to do with massive, corporate food production and processing in America. Maybe in other parts of the world, it wouldn't be so bad for you.

This was a featured story on democracynow.org the other day:

http://www.democracynow.org/2010/8/2...looming_threat

I was shocked to learn that chickens are fed arsenic because it helps them mature faster. And we wonder why cancer rates keep going up? Actually the pediatric cancer rate in Arkansas, where a lot of these factory farms are, is going through the roof.

Also I was shocked at this part:

Something else we feed chickens that people don’t realize is beef products. And when those chickens eat that beef product, some of it falls into their litter. Well, we produce so much chicken litter in this country, because of these factory farms, and it is so rich in phosphorus and nitrogen, its land application uses are limited. So you have surplus chicken litter and nothing to do with it. What do they do with it? They feed it to cattle. So we feed beef cows chicken crap. That chicken litter often contains bits and byproducts of cattle. So we are actually feeding cattle to cattle, which is a risk factor for bovine spongiform encephalopathy, better known as mad cow disease. We actually feed cattle products to cattle in three different ways: chicken litter, restaurant scraps, and blood products on dairy farms.

So yeah, it's an abomination!

[AprilHare]

Originally Posted by v1k1ng1001

Of course a lot of the reason why chicken is so awful has to do with massive, corporate food production and processing in America. Maybe in other parts of the world, it wouldn't be so bad for you.

I am not awful, nor am I a product of a massive corporate food production and processing system in America. I'm from Australia and am proud of it.. In fact, I assure you I am succulent, delicious with ample meat. And no, you can't eat me in your infernal chicken soup.

[dsvick]

Originally Posted by kindlekitten

won't work. I don't eat chicken. ever. at all. only eggs

You complain about the chicken having bad stuff in it - do you know where the eggs come from !?!?

[poohbear_nc]

Originally Posted by SameOldStory

How can such a young bird be so tough? I'm just going to have to "tenderize" him first.

OK, OK. I give up. You are too smart for me. You know that I was jut kidding anyway. Just having some fun is all.

Hay, you wana go to the gym and lift some weights? That would be fun, right?

I'll spot you so you don't get hurt. And then you can spot me. Thats fair.

But we have to go before the Saturday barbecue, so lets get moving.

Sure - I'm all for "bulking up" - that way I'll be tougher and too big to fit into your puny BBQ!

And - the only "toxins" I regularly ingest are fine single malt scotches!
And NO - that's not considered a pre-marinade! Stop drooling!

[SameOldStory]

Great! Come on down friend. I have all of the equipment exercise stuff needed to tone your muscles.




And we're going to have a surprise guest for the barbecue, too.




PS - Don't forget to bring all of your Scotch.

[poohbear_nc]

Errmm... think I'll stay at home a little longer and self-marinade, damn, I mean self-medicate! Feeling a little peckish today.

[SameOldStory]

(Heavy sigh)

Poohbear, your problem is that you have to get out a little and relax. How about if I have a hot tub of water waiting for you when you get here? You can sit back and let all that hot water soak deep into your bones. Relaxation, Aaaah

You can read my new book "Silence of the Chickens" as you soak away all your problems.

But you do have to get here before noon tomorrow.