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Old 06-01-2010, 02:13 AM   #31
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Just for you, how about a nice, warm glass of freshly recycled soy milk? On an IV drip?
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Old 06-01-2010, 02:13 AM   #32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by poohbear_nc View Post
I really don't know whether to be flattered, outraged, frightened, complimented, embarrassed, or get that warm fuzzy feeling [NOT like on the grill.]
So I think.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kindlekitten View Post
if the chicken would get in touch with his bearness this would not need to happen

regardless he has no need to worry about all that in this thread. It was meant to flatter of course.

Last edited by happy_terd; 06-01-2010 at 02:15 AM.
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Old 06-01-2010, 12:08 PM   #33
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I am deeply flattered that so many MR members care so deeply about my inner chickenness!

I will endeavor to live up to your high expectations of chickenhood and continue avoiding death by fire, grill, skewer, cooking pot, oven, safe house, and other fine suggestions!

Save your sauces for Thanksgiving!
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Old 06-01-2010, 12:12 PM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by poohbear_nc View Post
I am deeply flattered that so many MR members care so deeply about my inner chickenness!

I will endeavor to live up to your high expectations of chickenhood and continue avoiding death by fire, grill, skewer, cooking pot, oven, safe house, and other fine suggestions!

Save your sauces for Thanksgiving!
like I said, if you'd let your inner bear out, this wouldn't be an issue!
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Old 06-01-2010, 12:25 PM   #35
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like I said, if you'd let your inner bear out, this wouldn't be an issue!
Awwwwwwwwwwwww.... that little guy looks like he's thinking "Please don't eat me."
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Old 06-01-2010, 12:35 PM   #36
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Awwwwwwwwwwwww.... that little guy looks like he's thinking "Please don't eat me."
he's a sad little orphaned baby bear
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Old 06-02-2010, 12:54 PM   #37
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I dont know what they put in these, but yum.
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Old 06-02-2010, 01:54 PM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by poohbear_nc View Post
I am deeply flattered that so many MR members care so deeply about my inner chickenness!

I will endeavor to live up to your high expectations of chickenhood and continue avoiding death by fire, grill, skewer, cooking pot, oven, safe house, and other fine suggestions!

Save your sauces for Thanksgiving!
You're saved for today, Chicky, because today's Doughnut Day at MobileRead. But there's always tomorrow!
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Old 06-02-2010, 02:25 PM   #39
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?


Plato: For the greater good.

Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.

Machiavelli: So that its subjects will view it with admiration,
as a chicken which has the daring and courage to
boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom
among them has the strength to contend with such a
paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the
princely chicken's dominion maintained.

Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its
pancreas.

Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered
within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and
each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial
intent can never be discerned, because structuralism
is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!

Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment
would let it take.

Douglas Adams: Forty-two.

Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road
gazes also across you.

Oliver North: National Security was at stake.

B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences which had pervaded its
sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a
fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while
believing these actions to be of its own free will.

Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt
necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at
this historical juncture, and therefore
synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself,
the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into the
objects "chicken" and "road", and circumstances came
into being which caused the actualization of this
potential occurrence.

Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed
the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Aristotle: To actualize its potential.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-
nature.

Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing
events to grace the annals of history. An historic,
unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt
such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to
homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.

Salvador Dali: The Fish.

Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from
the trees.

Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.

Epicurus: For fun.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.

Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken
was on, but it was moving very fast.

David Hume: Out of custom and habit.

Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored)
reason.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

Ronald Reagan: I forget.

John Sununu: The Air Force was only too happy to provide the
transportation, so quite understandably the chicken
availed himself of the opportunity.

The Sphinx: You tell me.

Mr. T: If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too!

Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow
out of life.

Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Molly Yard: It was a hen!

Zeno of Elea: To prove it could never reach the other side.

Chaucer: So priketh hem nature in hir corages.

Wordsworth: To wander lonely as a cloud.

The Godfather: I didn't want its mother to see it like that.

Keats: Philosophy will clip a chicken's wings.

Blake: To see heaven in a wild fowl.

Othello: Jealousy.

Dr Johnson: Sir, had you known the Chicken for as long as I have,
you would not so readily enquire, but feel rather the
Need to resist such a public Display of your own
lamentable and incorrigible Ignorance.

Mrs Thatcher: This chicken's not for turning.

Supreme Soviet: There has never been a chicken in this photograph.

Oscar Wilde: Why, indeed? One's social engagements whilst in
town ought never expose one to such barbarous
inconvenience - although, perhaps, if one must cross a
road, one may do far worse than to cross it as the
chicken in question.

Kafka: Hardly the most urgent enquiry to make of a low-grade
insurance clerk who woke up that morning as a hen.

Swift: It is, of course, inevitable that such a loathsome,
filth-ridden and degraded creature as Man should assume
to question the actions of one in all respects his
superior.

Macbeth: To have turned back were as tedious as to go o'er.

Whitehead: Clearly, having fallen victim to the fallacy of
misplaced concreteness.

Freud: An die andere Seite zu kommen. (Much laughter)

Hamlet: That is not the question.

Donne: It crosseth for thee.

Pope: It was mimicking my Lord Hervey.

Constable: To get a better view.
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Old 06-02-2010, 03:01 PM   #40
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Old 06-02-2010, 03:21 PM   #41
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Ha! Like that's going to do him any good!
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Old 06-02-2010, 06:18 PM   #42
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Ha! Like that's going to do him any good!
The way things are going - it couldn't hurt!!
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Old 06-03-2010, 07:44 AM   #43
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Uh oh.
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Old 06-03-2010, 07:53 AM   #44
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Astrological Chickens
Zodiacal Influence on Chicken Crossing Behaviour


SAGITTARIUS (November 23 to December 21):
These chickens are restless and visionary. They love to explore new horizons and see life as a journey full of adventure. They greet every new experience with a warm heart, a ready smile and an open mind. They cross the road because of a passion to see more of the world and a spirit which longs to be free.
That's him! that's exactly chicken dear! Visionary and open minded.
Plus he is very intelligent, not only as chicken but also as MR member (if that is on a higher step).

Last edited by beppe; 06-03-2010 at 08:05 AM.
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Old 06-03-2010, 07:59 AM   #45
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow
out of life.

Constable: To get a better view.
My preferred.
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