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Old 03-08-2013, 11:38 AM   #6211
DianNC
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A new young monk arrives at the monastery. He’s assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript.

So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up. In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, “We've been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son.”

So, he goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscript is held as archives in a locked vault that hasn’t been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot. So, the young monk gets worried and goes downstairs to look for him.

He sees him banging his head against the wall, and wailing, “We forgot the R. We forgot the R.“ His forehead is all bloodied and bruised, and he’s crying uncontrollably.

The young monk asks the old abbot, “What’s wrong, Father?”

With a choking voice, the old abbot replies, “The word should be celebRate!”
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Old 03-08-2013, 02:15 PM   #6212
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... “The word should be celebRate!”...
For good measure a very felt "F" word should be added in that sentence...
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Old 03-08-2013, 02:39 PM   #6213
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With a choking voice, the old abbot replies, “The word should be celebRate!”
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Old 03-08-2013, 03:46 PM   #6214
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My bed gets mysteriously more comfortable in the morning… anybody else?
That narrow space under your bed is not too bad...
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Old 03-08-2013, 05:40 PM   #6215
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95% of the ocean remains unexplored and you're telling me mermaids don't exist?
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Old 03-08-2013, 06:31 PM   #6216
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95% of the ocean remains unexplored and you're telling me mermaids don't exist?
I spend a LOT of time exploring the undersea world, and I know for a fact that mermaids DO exist! I married one!


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Old 03-08-2013, 07:48 PM   #6217
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Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on, the first surgeon said, "Electricians are the best, everything inside is color coded." The second surgeon says, "No, Librarians are, everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The third surgeon shut them both up with: "You're all wrong, politicians are the easiest to operate on, there's no guts, no heart, no brains, and no spine. Plus the head and the tail end are interchangeable."

Last edited by WT Sharpe; 03-10-2013 at 09:50 AM.
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Old 03-09-2013, 06:36 AM   #6218
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Why did the chicken commit suicide?

To get to the other side

Last edited by orlok; 03-09-2013 at 06:39 AM.
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Old 03-09-2013, 08:30 AM   #6219
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Why did the chicken commit suicide?

To get to the other side

We are beginning to worry about you. Is there reason we should be concerned?


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Old 03-09-2013, 09:23 AM   #6220
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Roses are red, violets are blue
I've got Alzheimer's
Cheese on toast

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We are beginning to worry about you. Is there reason we should be concerned?


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What makes you say that?
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Old 03-09-2013, 03:25 PM   #6221
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Is that a sandwich?
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Everything is so much funnier when you’re not allowed to laugh.
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Old 03-09-2013, 05:24 PM   #6222
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For that reason Church has always been a killer for me!
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Old 03-09-2013, 11:31 PM   #6223
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Why did the chicken commit suicide?

To get to the other side
That's sick, depraved, and oddly, I have the strangest urge to run out and tell it to the first person I meet.
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Old 03-10-2013, 03:44 PM   #6224
Fbone
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My mother thinks my friends are bad influences. But honestly, I’m usually the one coming up with the ideas.
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Old 03-10-2013, 10:20 PM   #6225
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Our library now offers "suicide for dummies" in ebook edition only. The return rate of the printed edition sucked.
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