Unutterably Silly Corrupt-A-Topic (anymore off-topic and it would be on-topic)

[RWood]

Candy is dancy, but one of Marc's parties is quicker.

[vivaldirules]

Life is a doughnut.

[Slite]

I feel so damn tired today, due to puppy having tummy problems.

[pshrynk]

Say no more! say no more!

[vivaldirules]

Danger: Robot Malfunctioning!

[Nate the great]

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

Lewis Carroll

[Slite]

"You wanna fuck with me? Okay. You wanna play rough? Okay. Say hello to my little friend!" Tony Montana

[RWood]

In April 1988, Executive Order 12637, Productivity Improvement for the Federal Government, called for the establishment of a government-wide program to improve the quality, timeliness and efficiency of services provided by the Federal Government. Subsequently, a Multiple Award Schedule for the implementation of Total Quality Management was established in the Federal Government. The current edition of the Executive Order is 13048, Improving Administrative Management in the Executive Branch. This program evolved into the Management, Organizational and Business Improvement Services Schedule. Subsequently, Special Item Numbers 874-6, Competitive Sourcing Support, and 874-7, Program Integration and Project Management Services were added. These new items expanded MOBIS beyond assisting agencies in performance improvement functions and into the realm of fulfilling mission-oriented work. The Schedule title has therefore been changed to Mission Oriented Business Integrated Services.

[LazyScot]

Originally Posted by RWood

Candy is dancy, but one of Marc's parties is quicker.

I don't think Marc's parties are "quick", they just operate at a non-constant temporal velocity different from that of the observers and participants. It is believed this is because he likes the doppler effects this achieves in the minds of anyone within range.

[badgoodDeb]

I want the new MacBook for Christmas!!!

[RWood]

Rawhide flavored bubble gum for dogs.

[pshrynk]

New Discovery - The Heaviest Element Known to Science

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons

[RickyMaveety]

I am really hungry and for some unknown reason I itch all over.

[RWood]

In the mail today were a whole bunch of envelopes with little windows in them and my address showing through the window. Inside were requests for donations to the gas company, the water works, the electricv company, Radio Shack, and a bunch of banks with more money than I have.

[montsnmags]

That's Numberwang!