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Old 11-21-2012, 05:57 AM   #31
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Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
A reviewer says I should read this in a locked room.

Unfortunately, I consider it very troublesome that every time I decide to read this, I must get up and lock my room. And which room is he talking about? The kitchen? The master bedroom? The bathroom - and this is where I read with the light out, which another person suggested I do before reading that ebook!


I suppose reading on the terrace is completely out of the question, as there is no lock to contend with unless, of course, he means I should lock myself out of my own house.

What's next? I should read only in my dinner jacket? Or wearing only my underwear?

I'm really very confused right now, because I would like to read this book.




Don


Okay, he says "good read in a locked room." I believe it will be "an excellent read in an unlocked room, or out on the terrace."

Stop reading reviews and all your problems will be solved!

Seriously, though, what a peculiar statement. I have no idea what he means by that... unless he read it in a locked room - like a padded cell? lol
Last edited by NightBird; 11-21-2012 at 05:59 AM.
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Old 11-21-2012, 07:15 AM   #32
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I believe it's similar to the hyperbole that one reads when encountering this kind of nonsense: "This book is so scary you won't be able to put it down," which can cause certain problems - especially to honeymooners or those with irritable bowl syndrome.



Don
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“How to Write the First 3 Paragraphs of YOUR Indie Novel” - by Max Waxwelp
1) Always write 3 sentences of exposition; 2) now create some dialogue, preferably no more than 2 sentences; and 3) make certain the dialogue is either inane or humorous. Example:
“Bob, I did not know you wore yellow suspenders,” Sally remarked.
“Gee, Sally, those are not suspenders. I am wearing yellow underwear today,” Bob revealed.
The dialogue above will help produce at least 100 more pages of dialogue.
Last edited by Dr. Drib; 11-21-2012 at 07:37 AM.
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Old 11-22-2012, 04:24 AM   #33
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
I believe it's similar to the hyperbole that one reads when encountering this kind of nonsense: "This book is so scary you won't be able to put it down," which can cause certain problems - especially to honeymooners or those with irritable bowl syndrome.



Don
It's annoying enough for those of us that require both hands to work (or go to work or just to make the coffee in the morning). Nothing worse than a sticky book.
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Old 11-23-2012, 05:56 AM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
I believe it's similar to the hyperbole that one reads when encountering this kind of nonsense: "This book is so scary you won't be able to put it down," which can cause certain problems - especially to honeymooners or those with irritable bowl syndrome.



Don
LOL.

Some freebies from Evil Jester Press:

The Love of the Dead by Craig Saunders.

Quote:
When Beth Willis, who normally speaks for the deceased, is given a message from a dead medium, she steps beyond her world, into the spirit realm.

D.I. Coleridge is a man marking time, until a call from Beth gives him a lead on an elusive killer who takes trophies from his victims. A killer who walks through both worlds, taking lives. A man with powers no mortal can possess. A man, but something else, too.

If Coleridge and Beth are to survive, they must understand him...but some men cannot be fought. Some creatures cannot be bested.

Death calls on all in time. But if Beth and Coleridge are to win, they have no choice but to call on Death themselves.
Attic Toys - Short Stories.

Quote:
19 amazing tales by the masters and rising stars of speculative fiction.

Includes all new stories by Piers Anthony, Jeff Strand, Joe McKinney, Lisa Morton, Jeremy C. Shipp, Gary McMahon, Aric Sundquist, and many more!
TOC:
Spoiler:

INSIDE THE BOXES by Jeff Strand
DOWN IN THE WOODS TODAY by Emily C. Skaftun
DOLLHOUSE by Craig Wallwork
POOR ME AND TED by Kate Jonez
A LITTLE CRIMSON STAIN by Joe McKinney
I HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE by S.S. Michaels
DREAMS OF A RAGGED DOLL by Cate Gardner
ATTIC DOG by David Raffin
WHEN HARRY KILLED SALLY by Lisa Morton
LIVING DOLL by Piers Anthony
THE WHITE KNIGHT by Aric Sundquist
THE DOLL TREE by Amelia Mangan
A LITTLE TERROR by Phil Hickes
GIVE IT A NAME by Gary McMahon
DISCARDED by Nancy Rosenberg England
GOOGLY by Jeremy C. Shipp
RUBIK'S CUBE by Melanie Mascio
A BRIGHTLY-COLORED BOX FILLED WITH STARS by Dorian Dawes
THE TEA-SERVING DOLL by Mae Empson


Windwalkers by R. Michael Burns.

Quote:
When a nightmarish blizzard drives college students Nick Bookman and Robin Kelley to take shelter in a small-town Minnesota church, they are forced to confront the intimate secret that is tearing their friendship apart. The appearance of another storm refugee, Alicia Morgan, an attractive high school senior and self-described witch, arouses Nick's interest and threatens to strain the old friends' relationship past the shattering point.

Then one of the men trapped in the church disappears in the deep of the night, and his young daughter stumbles in from the storm babbling about monsters. Only Alicia recognizes the creature from the child's tale -- a wendigo, an ancient spirit that embodies the hunger for human flesh.

Soon there is no doubt -- the windwalkers are on the hunt, and the refugees discover that they must fight not only with the menace that haunts the storm, but their own darkest desires. If they cannot control their hungers, their hungers will consume them. Only the strongest hearts among the strange band of storm refugees have any hope of surviving the long blizzard night....
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Old 11-23-2012, 06:07 AM   #35
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Slag Attack by Andersen Prunty is free from Eraserhead Press.

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A slag is what survivors are calling the slug-like maggots raining from the sky, burrowing inside people, and hollowing out their flesh and their sanity. Slag Attack features four visceral, noir stories about the living, crawling apocalypse.

The Devastated Insides of Hollow City - Hack detective Shell joins in the insane search for a girl named Pearl, who just might hold the key to restoring order.

Vincent Severity - A woman is taken hostage by a very severe man in a sleazy El Camino.

Corpse Mountain - Two guys named Cobra and Commando chug gasoline and help build grotesque robots to save the world.

All Alone at the End of the World - Re-introduces Shell in a radically different light, building to a ferocious conclusion.
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Old 11-23-2012, 07:09 AM   #36
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I love slugs so much.

Slugs can be your friends, if you'll let them.

They're even useful for party fun: The next time you visit a public pool, just simply put a few slugs in the discarded underwear. Jolly mayhem will put a smile on your face.

...and party trays: Don't get me started!

Thanks, NightBird. Now downloaded and temporarily housed in my aquarium.




Don
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1) Always write 3 sentences of exposition; 2) now create some dialogue, preferably no more than 2 sentences; and 3) make certain the dialogue is either inane or humorous. Example:
“Bob, I did not know you wore yellow suspenders,” Sally remarked.
“Gee, Sally, those are not suspenders. I am wearing yellow underwear today,” Bob revealed.
The dialogue above will help produce at least 100 more pages of dialogue.
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Old 11-23-2012, 04:58 PM   #37
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Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
I love slugs so much.

...and party trays: Don't get me started!
Slug sushi is especially delicious.

Edit: of course, works best with larger slugs.
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Old 11-24-2012, 05:03 AM   #38
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A Quick Bite of Flesh: An Anthology of Zombie Flash Fiction is free from Hazardous Press.

Quote:
A Quick Bite of Flesh is an outstanding collection of 55 bite-sized tales of zombie goodness. Stories of terror, sadness, adventure, revenge and betrayal. Whether you like your zombie stories terrifying, humorous, or bizarre, you will find plenty to love in this collection.

Stories by Terry Alexander, Jason Andrew, Michael H. Antonio, Mary Ann Back, Rose Blackthorn, H.G. Bleackley, Rebecca L. Brown, Charles Colyott, Alyn Day, Mandy DeGeit, Deborah Drake, T. Fox Dunham, Kris Freestone, Aaron Gudmunson, Tara Fox Hall, Dane Hatchell, Janet Joyce Holden, David James Keaton, Ken MacGregor, John McCarthy, Fi Michell, Joe Mogel, Doug Murano, Paco, Jennifer Paquette, Lucy Pireel, Joseph Polega, Tori L. Ridgewood, Suzanne Robb, Armand Rosamilia, Cinsearae S., Mark Scioneaux, Matthew Smallwood, Rebecca Snow, Tony Southcotte, Cameron Suey, Emily Vater, Edd Vick, Steve Voelker, D. Alexander Ward, L.E. White, Sheri White, William Whorton, Jay Wilburn, Matthew Wilson, Robert S. Wilson, and Wol-vriey.

As an added bonus, the Kindle edition contains Chapter One of Jay Wilburn's zombie novel, Loose Ends.
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Old 11-24-2012, 05:38 AM   #39
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Got the "Quick Bite of Flesh"!

(And I thought all I had was a mosquito bite. Foolish me!)

Thanks, NightBird.


Don
__________________
“How to Write the First 3 Paragraphs of YOUR Indie Novel” - by Max Waxwelp
1) Always write 3 sentences of exposition; 2) now create some dialogue, preferably no more than 2 sentences; and 3) make certain the dialogue is either inane or humorous. Example:
“Bob, I did not know you wore yellow suspenders,” Sally remarked.
“Gee, Sally, those are not suspenders. I am wearing yellow underwear today,” Bob revealed.
The dialogue above will help produce at least 100 more pages of dialogue.
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Old 11-24-2012, 06:41 PM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
I love slugs so much.

Slugs can be your friends, if you'll let them.

They're even useful for party fun: The next time you visit a public pool, just simply put a few slugs in the discarded underwear. Jolly mayhem will put a smile on your face.

...and party trays: Don't get me started!

Thanks, NightBird. Now downloaded and temporarily housed in my aquarium.




Don
Quote:
Originally Posted by Indio777 View Post
Slug sushi is especially delicious.

Edit: of course, works best with larger slugs.
Y'all are grossing me out, here!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
Got the "Quick Bite of Flesh"!

(And I thought all I had was a mosquito bite. Foolish me!)

Thanks, NightBird.


Don
You really fooled me on this one. I thought you would spit on these and say there were too short.
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Old 11-28-2012, 05:18 PM   #41
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Free from Severed Press - The Hunt by Joseph Williams.

Quote:
After completing her freshman year of college in East Lansing, DOREEN WOODS returns to her hometown of Northville, Michigan with plenty of problems. A drug-dealer boyfriend who has her hooked on his new product. An alcoholic father who abuses his wife. A history of body image issues. Paralyzing bouts of depression. Cutting.

Things are about to get worse.

She’s just called her best friend, Katy, to drive her home from a long night of partying, but Katy has other plans for Doreen. Like having her chased by a soul-sucking demon across a nightmarish landscape of haunted forests, endless oceans, and hungry undead, all while experiencing withdrawal from her new drug of choice: the little doctors.

But there is more to fear in the shadows than monsters and demons. Doreen soon learns that, when you’re in THE HUNT, nothing is ever what it seems, and there’s only one way out.
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Old 11-28-2012, 05:28 PM   #42
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No one likes to be chased by a soul-sucking demon, especially when one is out eating pizza with the family.

I'll pass on this one.....



Don
__________________
“How to Write the First 3 Paragraphs of YOUR Indie Novel” - by Max Waxwelp
1) Always write 3 sentences of exposition; 2) now create some dialogue, preferably no more than 2 sentences; and 3) make certain the dialogue is either inane or humorous. Example:
“Bob, I did not know you wore yellow suspenders,” Sally remarked.
“Gee, Sally, those are not suspenders. I am wearing yellow underwear today,” Bob revealed.
The dialogue above will help produce at least 100 more pages of dialogue.
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Old 11-28-2012, 05:41 PM   #43
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You'll be sorry...
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Old 11-28-2012, 06:07 PM   #44
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No one likes to be chased by a soul-sucking demon, especially when one is out eating pizza with the family.

I'll pass on this one.....



Don
That book's link has an Amazon affiliate info attached to it. I'm noticing that some Amazon links have an affiliate with them. I think you (or another mod) will need to look at all the Amazon links in this thread and remove the affiliates.
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Old 11-28-2012, 07:15 PM   #45
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You'll be sorry...

Ok....you convinced me.



Don
__________________
“How to Write the First 3 Paragraphs of YOUR Indie Novel” - by Max Waxwelp
1) Always write 3 sentences of exposition; 2) now create some dialogue, preferably no more than 2 sentences; and 3) make certain the dialogue is either inane or humorous. Example:
“Bob, I did not know you wore yellow suspenders,” Sally remarked.
“Gee, Sally, those are not suspenders. I am wearing yellow underwear today,” Bob revealed.
The dialogue above will help produce at least 100 more pages of dialogue.
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