Silliness Escape Committee - Page 37

RWood · 03-04-2009, 09:50 AM

How about we make fake IDs for the Europeans so they can buy Kindles?

GeoffC · 03-04-2009, 09:54 AM

Why would we want an Kindle ....

RWood · 03-04-2009, 09:58 AM

Many do, some don't. Some people even try to leave this place of eternal llamas. It takes all kinds.

GeoffC · 03-04-2009, 12:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RWood

.....Some people even try to leave this place of eternal llamas. It takes all kinds.

Oh ! shock horror ...never !

Sweetpea · 03-05-2009, 03:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RWood

Many do, some don't. Some people even try to leave this place of eternal llamas. It takes all kinds.

But, as with the Kindle, nobody succeeds by using the official way...

LazyScot · 05-07-2009, 06:02 PM

The scene is pure, bright, featureless, blinding white. As your eyes adjust, firstly the white changes to that strange dirty not-white white that only perpetual cleaning at a clinical institution can achieve. Next, a strange, grid-like pattern appears, dividing and texturing, as the image resolves, unsurprisingly, into a padded, white cell which has, at its centre a white bed covered in white sheets with a figure underneath tied down and wearing a white, painted fencing mask.

"nnghm gomemmn geeease nmgt gh mnnh nmmm mggh!!!" exclaimed the presumably gagged figure on the bed. Fortunately, for those of you reading this, there was an on-call dentist available to deploy his expert skills at interpreting words spoken with an incapacitated or disabled mouth. "Will someone please get me out of here!", translated the dentist.

At this point, by way of explanation, it is worth pointing out that the figure on the bed is, in fact, LazyScot, who has been intriguing the staff for some time, most notably because of a unique behaviour he started exhibiting. The symptoms of an attack are preceded by him exclaiming "ZCD: incoming!" and his eyes rotating. The actual attack was categorised by the doctors as multiple body disorder. Essentially the one LazyScot suddenly became multiple LazyScots, all arguing with himself. This particular disorder was classified as "exceptionally dangerous" when an orderly was trying to separate him from himself after a heated discussion on malts. This would not have, in itself, been a particularly dangerous except for the fact that that was when the attack suddenly ended and all the versions of LazyScot suddenly and speedily flew together and resolved back into a single body. (The orderly is still suffering from severe demophobia as a result of his experience, though most of his broken bones have healed.) However, the staff rapidly found his condition as an ideal source of research papers, and to date his condition has generated seventeen publications (all bar one of which were successfully submitted to conferences taking place at exceptionally hard to reach locations around the pacific rim – and two at previously unknown events taking place in French Polynesia). At this point, purely for his care and own safety, the staff moved LazyScot to this new room, and provided it with three orderlies who, apart from their white(ish) uniforms looked more like they should have been bouncers on a dubious nightclub in a rather rough area. All of which goes a little way towards explaining the need for the following disturbance.

From behind the door the following could be heard:

"What on earth are you? Silent huh? Well stop, now. Or I'll…. Right. Silly costume or not…" There followed the sound of something like a baton hitting fur, followed by a pause, followed by several batons hitting some fur. Then two thumps and a brief sound of running feet followed by a clump that might, for those with active imaginations have been the sound of one hurled unconscious body colliding with a fleeing bouncer.

The door opened, and in walked Pandborg-B. At least, for the purposes of the narrative we shall assume it was Pandaborg-B since he was no longer wearing the Batman uniform.

zelda_pinwheel · 05-07-2009, 06:14 PM

oh no ! poor lazy scot !!! what have they done to you ?? marc, you have some SERIOUS EXPLAINING to do !! just look at the state he's in, poor thing ! that pandaborg better have a good plan, that's all i can say !!!

montsnmags · 05-07-2009, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

oh no ! poor lazy scot !!! what have they done to you ?? marc, you have some SERIOUS EXPLAINING to do !! just look at the state he's in, poor thing ! that pandaborg better have a good plan, that's all i can say !!!

Oh, dear (a female dear, ray, a drop of golden suuuun....). I'm not real good at SERIOUS explaining. Can't I just explain in SILLY, and you extrapolate from there (that I've actually said nothing explanatory whatsoever))? My summary: well, let's just say that there's a "A heavy cloth woven" involved, "with rich, often varicolored designs or scenes, usually hung on walls for decoration and sometimes used to cover furniture".

Cheers,
Marc

zelda_pinwheel · 05-07-2009, 10:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by montsnmags

Oh, dear (a female dear, ray, a drop of golden suuuun....). I'm not real good at SERIOUS explaining. Can't I just explain in SILLY, and you extrapolate from there (that I've actually said nothing explanatory whatsoever))? My summary: well, let's just say that there's a "A heavy cloth woven" involved, "with rich, often varicolored designs or scenes, usually hung on walls for decoration and sometimes used to cover furniture".

Cheers,
Marc

LazyScot · 05-08-2009, 05:12 PM

"oggg gnnak gmmmnadess. Goow gnp gee mphhn ggh rrrer!" "Oh thank goodness. Now get me out of here!" translated the dentist who was still loitering with intent.

"I need a little help from you. A few of us and some llamas plan to free the (mostly) innocent, to unmask evil, to identify moles and maybe catch a few good shows," started Panaborg-B acting as if he completely understood exactly what LazyScot was saying, but wanted his assistance before he'd release him.

"Nghmph uungh? G Nggmph ghwwt fgnhmmph nmphf Gy gnnm ghwwwf gfff. GOOW NGHHSM GEE!" shouted an increasingly agitated LazyScot, for whom the potential for continuing under the care and attention of the staff did not appear to be highly desirable. "Help you? I remember what happened last time I was on a trip with you. Now Untie me!" translated the dentist.

"You see, we have a convenient window about now as Dr Camembert is away on holiday, and since he's in charge… Well you know the saying – whilst the cat is away, the mice will play. That and the fact the laddy on the door managed to sneak a couple of ZCDs from the doctor's stash. So if you'd be willing to help…."

"JLKADSJ FKKKS ASDKKK" shouted an agitated LazyScot. "Ummm. Since this is a family forum, I don't think I should translate that," said the dentist, "but he did indicate he'd like to be untied."

"You see, you would be helpful, but if we let you out, then your disappearance may be noticed. And since there is a mole here, well it would cause us problems. Now that risk is worth it if you help us, but otherwise…"

"ngg gfff hgh Gy nmphfg goo ffmphg ffoo, fgphff geeww gaad m meeepf fpfpp go gfff gfnmphf gffng gvve fghnmf." "How about if I agree to help you, after I've made a quick trip to the new Writers' wing they've built?" came the translation as everyone stared expectantly at the dentist.

"If they notice you are gone, they are bound to search all the wings—and I really don't want you telling them what I'm planning. And anyway that would be a silly thing to do."

"ng gmphf gf faaf fnmghph? Gaagny, foo faaf gnmph gyy gamph ghee gf gfhhhd. Gan g'll gnmph gfagh ga goon g'f nmagnn n fnmff foo," mumbled LazyScot as everyone turned towards the dentist. "And silly is bad because? Anyway, you can take my place here in the bed. And I'll come back as soon as I've finished and help out."

"That is a very good point. Will you give me your word that you'll to help us if I let you go?"

LazyScot nodded, at least partly because he was bored speaking in mumble, and nervous that the dentist might start wanting translation fees (and he was clean out of bacon). Pandaborg-B released him, taking LazyScot's place on the bed to cover his trip to the Writers' wing.

"Won't the orderlies sound the alarm?" asked LazyScot as he prepared to leave.

"And admit that one cute and cuddly Panda beat up three burly bouncers? If they think you're still in here they'll stay quiet. It's just fortunate there's no video surveillance here."

"I'd better put the gag in place, just in case."

It must be said that, had Pandaborg-B not been tied down already, it is unlikely that LazyScot could have completed this particular part of the disguise. And with that, he swiftly left the room, carrying the USB key he had loaded whilst at the secret Google research establishment. But just before he closed the door, he put his head back round and said, "I may be some time – I have a number of things to post…"

Given the somewhat agitated nature of Pandaborg-B's response to this parting remark, it was probably just as well, given the family nature of the forum, that the dentist had been called away to perform an emergency scale and polish.

zelda_pinwheel · 05-08-2009, 05:23 PM

ooooh, this is really getting good now !!!! i can't wait to see what's on that usb key...

ShortNCuddlyAm · 05-08-2009, 05:24 PM

Rushing over to the writer's wing right now

Eastlondonboy · 05-26-2010, 03:18 PM

I would like a Kindle so I can buy my book.

Mindy · 06-08-2010, 06:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eastlondonboy

I would like a Kindle so I can buy my book.

Nope, not random enough to be allowed INTO the llounge, never mind out of it.

pshrynk · 06-08-2010, 09:19 AM

So, what is on that USB key, anyway? You know how cranky people around here get when a story isn't finished...

Oh. Right.

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03-04-2009, 09:50 AM	#541
RWood Technogeezer Posts: 7,233 Karma: 1601464 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Virginia, USA Device: Sony PRS-500	How about we make fake IDs for the Europeans so they can buy Kindles?

03-04-2009, 09:54 AM	#542
GeoffC Chocolate Grasshopper ... Posts: 27,600 Karma: 20821184 Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW	Why would we want an Kindle ....

03-04-2009, 09:58 AM	#543
RWood Technogeezer Posts: 7,233 Karma: 1601464 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Virginia, USA Device: Sony PRS-500	Many do, some don't. Some people even try to leave this place of eternal llamas. It takes all kinds.

05-07-2009, 06:02 PM	#546
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	The scene is pure, bright, featureless, blinding white. As your eyes adjust, firstly the white changes to that strange dirty not-white white that only perpetual cleaning at a clinical institution can achieve. Next, a strange, grid-like pattern appears, dividing and texturing, as the image resolves, unsurprisingly, into a padded, white cell which has, at its centre a white bed covered in white sheets with a figure underneath tied down and wearing a white, painted fencing mask. "nnghm gomemmn geeease nmgt gh mnnh nmmm mggh!!!" exclaimed the presumably gagged figure on the bed. Fortunately, for those of you reading this, there was an on-call dentist available to deploy his expert skills at interpreting words spoken with an incapacitated or disabled mouth. "Will someone please get me out of here!", translated the dentist. At this point, by way of explanation, it is worth pointing out that the figure on the bed is, in fact, LazyScot, who has been intriguing the staff for some time, most notably because of a unique behaviour he started exhibiting. The symptoms of an attack are preceded by him exclaiming "ZCD: incoming!" and his eyes rotating. The actual attack was categorised by the doctors as multiple body disorder. Essentially the one LazyScot suddenly became multiple LazyScots, all arguing with himself. This particular disorder was classified as "exceptionally dangerous" when an orderly was trying to separate him from himself after a heated discussion on malts. This would not have, in itself, been a particularly dangerous except for the fact that that was when the attack suddenly ended and all the versions of LazyScot suddenly and speedily flew together and resolved back into a single body. (The orderly is still suffering from severe demophobia as a result of his experience, though most of his broken bones have healed.) However, the staff rapidly found his condition as an ideal source of research papers, and to date his condition has generated seventeen publications (all bar one of which were successfully submitted to conferences taking place at exceptionally hard to reach locations around the pacific rim – and two at previously unknown events taking place in French Polynesia). At this point, purely for his care and own safety, the staff moved LazyScot to this new room, and provided it with three orderlies who, apart from their white(ish) uniforms looked more like they should have been bouncers on a dubious nightclub in a rather rough area. All of which goes a little way towards explaining the need for the following disturbance. From behind the door the following could be heard: "What on earth are you? Silent huh? Well stop, now. Or I'll…. Right. Silly costume or not…" There followed the sound of something like a baton hitting fur, followed by a pause, followed by several batons hitting some fur. Then two thumps and a brief sound of running feet followed by a clump that might, for those with active imaginations have been the sound of one hurled unconscious body colliding with a fleeing bouncer. The door opened, and in walked Pandborg-B. At least, for the purposes of the narrative we shall assume it was Pandaborg-B since he was no longer wearing the Batman uniform.

05-07-2009, 06:14 PM	#547
zelda_pinwheel zeldinha zippy zeldissima Posts: 27,827 Karma: 921169 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Paris, France Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?	oh no ! poor lazy scot !!! what have they done to you ?? marc, you have some SERIOUS EXPLAINING to do !! just look at the state he's in, poor thing ! that pandaborg better have a good plan, that's all i can say !!!

05-08-2009, 05:12 PM	#550
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	"oggg gnnak gmmmnadess. Goow gnp gee mphhn ggh rrrer!" "Oh thank goodness. Now get me out of here!" translated the dentist who was still loitering with intent. "I need a little help from you. A few of us and some llamas plan to free the (mostly) innocent, to unmask evil, to identify moles and maybe catch a few good shows," started Panaborg-B acting as if he completely understood exactly what LazyScot was saying, but wanted his assistance before he'd release him. "Nghmph uungh? G Nggmph ghwwt fgnhmmph nmphf Gy gnnm ghwwwf gfff. GOOW NGHHSM GEE!" shouted an increasingly agitated LazyScot, for whom the potential for continuing under the care and attention of the staff did not appear to be highly desirable. "Help you? I remember what happened last time I was on a trip with you. Now Untie me!" translated the dentist. "You see, we have a convenient window about now as Dr Camembert is away on holiday, and since he's in charge… Well you know the saying – whilst the cat is away, the mice will play. That and the fact the laddy on the door managed to sneak a couple of ZCDs from the doctor's stash. So if you'd be willing to help…." "JLKADSJ FKKKS ASDKKK" shouted an agitated LazyScot. "Ummm. Since this is a family forum, I don't think I should translate that," said the dentist, "but he did indicate he'd like to be untied." "You see, you would be helpful, but if we let you out, then your disappearance may be noticed. And since there is a mole here, well it would cause us problems. Now that risk is worth it if you help us, but otherwise…" "ngg gfff hgh Gy nmphfg goo ffmphg ffoo, fgphff geeww gaad m meeepf fpfpp go gfff gfnmphf gffng gvve fghnmf." "How about if I agree to help you, after I've made a quick trip to the new Writers' wing they've built?" came the translation as everyone stared expectantly at the dentist. "If they notice you are gone, they are bound to search all the wings—and I really don't want you telling them what I'm planning. And anyway that would be a silly thing to do." "ng gmphf gf faaf fnmghph? Gaagny, foo faaf gnmph gyy gamph ghee gf gfhhhd. Gan g'll gnmph gfagh ga goon g'f nmagnn n fnmff foo," mumbled LazyScot as everyone turned towards the dentist. "And silly is bad because? Anyway, you can take my place here in the bed. And I'll come back as soon as I've finished and help out." "That is a very good point. Will you give me your word that you'll to help us if I let you go?" LazyScot nodded, at least partly because he was bored speaking in mumble, and nervous that the dentist might start wanting translation fees (and he was clean out of bacon). Pandaborg-B released him, taking LazyScot's place on the bed to cover his trip to the Writers' wing. "Won't the orderlies sound the alarm?" asked LazyScot as he prepared to leave. "And admit that one cute and cuddly Panda beat up three burly bouncers? If they think you're still in here they'll stay quiet. It's just fortunate there's no video surveillance here." "I'd better put the gag in place, just in case." It must be said that, had Pandaborg-B not been tied down already, it is unlikely that LazyScot could have completed this particular part of the disguise. And with that, he swiftly left the room, carrying the USB key he had loaded whilst at the secret Google research establishment. But just before he closed the door, he put his head back round and said, "I may be some time – I have a number of things to post…" Given the somewhat agitated nature of Pandaborg-B's response to this parting remark, it was probably just as well, given the family nature of the forum, that the dentist had been called away to perform an emergency scale and polish.

05-08-2009, 05:23 PM	#551
zelda_pinwheel zeldinha zippy zeldissima Posts: 27,827 Karma: 921169 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Paris, France Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?	ooooh, this is really getting good now !!!! i can't wait to see what's on that usb key...

05-08-2009, 05:24 PM	#552
ShortNCuddlyAm WWHALD Posts: 7,879 Karma: 337114 Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Mitcham, Surrey, UK Device: iPad. Selling my silver 505 here	Rushing over to the writer's wing right now

05-26-2010, 03:18 PM	#553
Eastlondonboy Banned Posts: 56 Karma: 160 Join Date: May 2010 Location: London, UK Device: kindle	I would like a Kindle so I can buy my book.

06-08-2010, 09:19 AM	#555
pshrynk Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah! Posts: 11,726 Karma: 8255450 Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: La Crosse, Wisconsin, aka America's IceBox Device: iThingie, KmkII, I miss Zelda!	So, what is on that USB key, anyway? You know how cranky people around here get when a story isn't finished... Oh. Right.

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