Help! Urgent! For My Colony!/Wow! I Want that!

[imperceptible]

This is urgent! I was eating ice to keep the fish fresh in my stomach so I could feed my off spring when! One of my off spring was captured! A ransome note was carved into my home and it said: "Trickle trickle every where be iggnorant if you dare" . So I started crying since Iwas bad at solving riddles and start to head inside. As I got inside I heard a loud screech."KLLLLLEAAA!!!!" I sharted faintly and confronted the holligan. It was a Shaiun. A half shark half penguin! Right then and there I found a note attached to its fin. It stated: "This is Jerup and if you don't teach him to read and right PDF'S I will keep your off spring and make him sing the national Bear anthem"! Right then and there I realized if I wanted to save my only son Pengtopa (out of 25 off spring what are the odds) I would have to teach this Shaiun to read! So I have started a quest to save my son and Pengtopia! For this quest to be completed I will need your help! I ask you the human race(even though I despise you) to help me! help yourself! Do a good deed for once! Help me find a reader! This is Pengtopia!

The Penguin Master

[spooky69]

fake.

[stustaff]

Originally Posted by spooky69

fake.

[Sarcasm ON] Realy??? your kidding? how can you tell. Its a good job you were here to point out that its fake or we would of never known...[Sarcasm OFF]

he he

p.s
I put the sarcasm tags in because most of you are from the US and I know you struggle with that.

[Madam Broshkina]

This is urgent! I was eating ice to keep the fish fresh in my stomach so I could feed my off spring when! One of my off spring was captured! A ransome note was carved into my home and it said: "Trickle trickle every where be iggnorant if you dare" . So I started crying since Iwas bad at solving riddles and start to head inside. As I got inside I heard a loud screech."KLLLLLEAAA!!!!" I sharted faintly and confronted the holligan. It was a Shaiun. A half shark half penguin! Right then and there I found a note attached to its fin. It stated: "This is Jerup and if you don't teach him to read and write PDF'S I will keep your off spring and make him sing the national Bear anthem"! Right then and there I realized if I wanted to save my only son Pengtopa (out of 25 off spring what are the odds) I would have to teach this Shaiun to read! So I have started a quest to save my son and Pengtopia! For this quest to be completed I will need your help! I ask you the human race(even though I despise you) to help me! help yourself! Do a good deed for once! Help me find a reader! This is Pengtopia!

Penguin Master, before you begin your quest for the perfect reader, I respectfully suggest that you look into getting a dictionary first. Your post is filled with numerous spelling errors. How are you going to teach the Shaiun to read and write PDF's when your own grasp of our (Human Race) language is limited? I would imagine that the Shaiun would be extremely upset to find out that the only reason that he was turned downed for the dream job that he wanted was because of spelling errors on his resume. The Shaiun might come after not only Pengtopa but his 24 siblings as well. Do you not agree that this would be very bad for Pengtopia?

Note 1: I have heard the "National Bear Anthem" and I think that it is a pretty good anthem!

Note 2: I hope that I am not being sexist by my saying that the Shaiun in question is a male. But from my experience a female Shaiun would not resort to such tactics.