The Worst Books I've Read - And Loving it!

[steven522]

Originally Posted by BenG

No I was thinking of covers like this one
http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3671/1...db2d97b7_b.jpg

Yeah, that is different from the one I have which looks more like a roman gladiator fight.

[BenG]

Terry Brooks' The Sword of Shannara was pretty badly written. The subsequent books were somewhat better, but I haven't made it past the original trilogy.
Lin Carter wrote in a survey of the fantasy published that year that it was "the single most cold-blooded, complete rip-off of another book that I have ever read," and "Brooks wasn't trying to imitate Tolkien's prose, just steal his story line and complete cast of characters, and did it with such clumsiness and so heavy-handedly, that he virtually rubbed your nose in it."

Of course by the 80s we wouldn't even blink at the news of another Tolkien rip-off.

[Lemurion]

What's truly sad is how many of these I've read:

Urshurak
Greyfax Grimwald
Blade
Gor
Venus on the Half-Shell

So much brain damage in one place...

[BenG]

I think Venus on the Half-shell was intentionally bad. It was by Philip José Farmer writing as Kilgore Trout. Trout was Kurt Vonnegut's fictional sci-fi author who wrote stories sold to adult magazines as filler between photo layouts.

[applesauce]

Oh I forgot about the Gor books, I read 3 and thought thy were beyond bad. Why has nobody said The Grey books, I swear I wanted to poke my eyes out after reading them. They were the first books I read on my kindle. I read all 3. I kept telling myself they had to get better, just keep reading.

applesauce

[QuantumIguana]

Who can forget "Eye of Argon"?

"Prepare to embrace your creators in the stygian haunts of hell, barbarian", gasped the first soldier.

"Only after you have kissed the fleeting stead of death, wretch!" returned Grignr.

A sweeping blade of flashing steel riveted from the massive barbarians hide enameled shield as his rippling right arm thrust forth, sending a steel shod blade to the hilt into the soldiers vital organs. The disemboweled mercenary crumpled from his saddle and sank to the clouded sward, sprinkling the parched dust with crimson droplets of escaping life fluid.

The enthused barbarian swilveled about, his shock of fiery red hair tossing robustly in the humid air currents as he faced the attack of the defeated soldier's fellow in arms.

"Damn you, barbarian" Shrieked the soldier as he observed his comrade in death.

[QuantumIguana]

There's "A Little Princess", which is not a bad book at all, but it does have this bit of unintentional humor, caused by the way language has changed in the last century:

All three of them incontinently fled from the room and tumbled into the hall. It was in this way they always welcomed their father.

I know what the author means, but the mental image it creates...

[banjomike]

Originally Posted by QuantumIguana

There's "A Little Princess", which is not a bad book at all, but it does have this bit of unintentional humor, caused by the way language has changed in the last century

Especially when an author compounds the issue with the use of several words which have changed somewhat in the last century:
So he sat as I dropped off to sleep, and so he sat when a sudden ejaculation caused me to wake up, and I found the summer sun shining into the apartment. The pipe was still between his lips, the smoke still curled upward, and the room was full of a dense tobacco haze, but nothing remained of the heap of shag which I had seen upon the previous night.

[wandalynn]

Originally Posted by Dr. Drib

Choice quotes?

We lived in the attic,
Christopher, Cory, Carrie, and me,
Now there are only three

Flower in the Attic

And, yes, this is the worst book of all time.

[radius]

Originally Posted by Dr. Drib

From the pen of Robert Leslie Bellem, one of the most entertainingly bad writers ever:

I'm going to stand up for RLB here as I enjoy his work (after finding it through your awesome compilations!)

You can make fun of his over the top language, but his plots hang together, the characters have understandable motivations, the pacing keeps you interested and he wraps everything up before you get fed up with him. All good things in a writer.

For me, my love-it-even-though-it's-crap book is the Dresden Files series. The first ones were absolutely horrific and almost robotically written -- I only perservered reading the series because of pressure from some friends. Then there was a period where the authour, Jim Butcher, learned his craft and was cranking out decently entertaining novels. Now lately, he has trouble dealing with the problems of long-running series.

But I still want to find out what happens