What do you when someone gives you a REALLY crappy Christmas present?

HarryT · 01-01-2010, 12:21 PM

The question says it all: what do you do when a close family member gives you a really crappy present? Would you pretend to like it (and risk a repeat), or tell them that it's rubbish, and ask if they can return it for a refund?

My temptation is to do the latter. What do other people think?

Verencat · 01-01-2010, 12:40 PM

It depends of the relationship you have with the person, and how susceptible that person is. Upon opening, I'd say it's nice with moderated enthusiasm, and since I'm a really enthusiastic person, it should be enough to prevent any repeats and it avoids any ruffling of feathers.
Since I guess you got the gift a while ago, I wouldn't ask the giver for a refund, but I would simply tell that person how much I appreciated the thought, but don't think I will use the gift very much, then close the sentence with another warm thank you. It's enough, again, to avoid repeats, and prevents any offended feelings.

daffy4u · 01-01-2010, 12:44 PM

Wow!

If HarryT is using the word "crappy", it must be bad.

I would just suck it up, say thanks and put it away (and donate it after enough time has passed).

HarryT · 01-01-2010, 12:57 PM

It's from my sister, and I gave her a REALLY nice present, too. Still, it's her birthday next month. Perhaps giving her something equally useless (I was going to suggest a tin of spaghetti, but at least you can eat that!) will make the point...

vivaldirules · 01-01-2010, 12:58 PM

I suppose one might logically ask: How likely is it that if you explained that it's rubbish that it would make them feel bad? If it's likely, is it worth doing so? Would it discourage them from buying rubbish in the future? If you don't explain it, are you and others likely to receive more crap in the future? I'm an expert at this, Harry.

By the way, can I interest you in about a dozen fruit cakes that I've accumulated over recent years from my aunt?

PennyPie · 01-01-2010, 01:00 PM

Re-gifting, ebaying it, donating it, sucking it up & display proudly when giver is coming to the house for a visit.....all viable options. Just depends on if you're the type that avoids making people feel bad at all costs, or the type that 'tells it like it is' & folks expect nothing less from you.

daffy4u · 01-01-2010, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

By the way, can I interest you in about a dozen fruit cakes that I've accumulated over recent years from my aunt?

I hear fruit cakes are the new cement shoes.

DixieGal · 01-01-2010, 01:01 PM

This year's crappy gift from Aunt Betty is next year's gift exchange item at the office party. Let 'em fight for it over a nice game of Dirty Santa!

Sweetpea · 01-01-2010, 01:19 PM

What is a really crappy present? Something you just would never use? Something that is bought as an afterthought (often cheap and broken either in the box or after 5 minutes of getting it)? Or something that is just so cheap that you wouldn't even think of buying it yourself (for yourself)?

If it was the first, I'd just say it and ask if you could exchange it for something you could use. If it's the second or third, I'd thank the giver rather cold, and don't even look at it after unwrapping (hoping the hint hits home...)

Wetdogeared · 01-01-2010, 01:28 PM

My sister just bought me a rather expensive small kitchen appliance for Christmas. I will probably seldom use it, I don't have the counter space and if I store it I'll never use it. She has one just like it and thought I would like it also. She even offered me the receipt if I wanted to return it for something else.

I graciously accepted it and will use it to cook dinner for her when she comes to visit this coming Monday.

(Since she had personally picked out the present I just couldn't refuse it but, deep down, I wish I had taken the offer of the receipt so that I could exchange it for something more useful. I guess politeness overruled usefulness.)

rhadin · 01-01-2010, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarryT

It's from my sister, and I gave her a REALLY nice present, too. Still, it's her birthday next month. Perhaps giving her something equally useless (I was going to suggest a tin of spaghetti, but at least you can eat that!) will make the point...

Harry, unfortunately I understand the problem. I rarely get a gift that I truly want or can use, primarily because if it was something I wanted, I've laready bought it and my family is opposed to giving gift certificates as gifts (my wife's fault on that -- she thinks it's too impersonal).

And over the years I have sucked it up, said thank you as heartily as I could, and let it go.

Then I had an epiphany -- a closetful of stuff neither I nor anyone else wanted or could use -- so I simply started telling people that I appreciated the thought and effort that went into the gift but that it was not something I would use, so leave me with the the thought and take back the gift.

Alas, I still get gifts that I don't want so I have decided to become philosophical about it: Beginning this year I have harped on the theme that holiday gift giving is really for the children and because times are tough, no more exchanging gifts among the adults. Everyone was relieved. And so this year, instead of getting numerous gifts that I really didn't want, I only got a gift from my wife that was thoughtful and not anything that I really wanted, but something I will use anyway because she gave it to me.

GA Russell · 01-01-2010, 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rhadin

...something I will use anyway because she gave it to me.

That's always my attitude.

Sparrow · 01-01-2010, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarryT

It's from my sister, and I gave her a REALLY nice present, too.

I'm guessing bubble bath in a dalek shaped bottle.

Personally I'm not fussed what I get. It was different when I was a child because Christmas and birthdays was the only chance to get something I really wanted; but as an adult I can get what I want for myself.
We tend to just buy token gifts for grownups and special ones for kids.

PennyPie · 01-01-2010, 03:12 PM

We don't have a lot of family, so a gift for each of hubby's grandkids, an envelope with $ for his 2 kids, and a few gifts for a small # of friends is about all on our list. We each don't have a lot of 'wants', and normally, thruout the year we get what we want when we want it. So, for the 2 of us, just a shirt or sweater or some socks is pretty much it...just to have something to 'open' (oh yea...and a sappy, sentimental 'I love you so much' Xmas card!) We're not real big on the holidays, and it's just so overblown, so commercialized (yes, we all say that, I know...)

My best gifts this year were bed pillows, collapsible kitchen food storage containers (for the boat), and a coffee mug with chihuahuas on it (I have a long-hair, 5 pounder - see photo below name at left) Less beloved gifts were graciously accepted, oohed over, and will one day go up on eBay. (not too soon, as givers all may see my offerings!)

kindlekitten · 01-01-2010, 03:20 PM

I gotta ask... what the hell is it?

01-01-2010, 12:21 PM	#1
HarryT eBook Enthusiast Posts: 85,544 Karma: 93383043 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: UK Device: Kindle Oasis 2, iPad Pro 10.5", iPhone 6	What do you when someone gives you a REALLY crappy Christmas present? The question says it all: what do you do when a close family member gives you a really crappy present? Would you pretend to like it (and risk a repeat), or tell them that it's rubbish, and ask if they can return it for a refund? My temptation is to do the latter. What do other people think?

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01-01-2010, 12:40 PM	#2
Verencat Wizard Posts: 2,615 Karma: 96491 Join Date: May 2009 Location: Montreal, Qc Device: xxx	It depends of the relationship you have with the person, and how susceptible that person is. Upon opening, I'd say it's nice with moderated enthusiasm, and since I'm a really enthusiastic person, it should be enough to prevent any repeats and it avoids any ruffling of feathers. Since I guess you got the gift a while ago, I wouldn't ask the giver for a refund, but I would simply tell that person how much I appreciated the thought, but don't think I will use the gift very much, then close the sentence with another warm thank you. It's enough, again, to avoid repeats, and prevents any offended feelings.

01-01-2010, 12:44 PM	#3
daffy4u I'm Super Kindle-icious Posts: 6,734 Karma: 2434103 Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Long Drive, Calinadia Candafornia Device: KDXG, KT, Oasis	Wow! If HarryT is using the word "crappy", it must be bad. I would just suck it up, say thanks and put it away (and donate it after enough time has passed).

01-01-2010, 12:57 PM	#4
HarryT eBook Enthusiast Posts: 85,544 Karma: 93383043 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: UK Device: Kindle Oasis 2, iPad Pro 10.5", iPhone 6	It's from my sister, and I gave her a REALLY nice present, too. Still, it's her birthday next month. Perhaps giving her something equally useless (I was going to suggest a tin of spaghetti, but at least you can eat that!) will make the point...

01-01-2010, 12:58 PM	#5
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	I suppose one might logically ask: How likely is it that if you explained that it's rubbish that it would make them feel bad? If it's likely, is it worth doing so? Would it discourage them from buying rubbish in the future? If you don't explain it, are you and others likely to receive more crap in the future? I'm an expert at this, Harry. By the way, can I interest you in about a dozen fruit cakes that I've accumulated over recent years from my aunt?

01-01-2010, 01:00 PM	#6
PennyPie Cocoa & Toast...mmmmmm... Posts: 275 Karma: 1000 Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Ohio Device: Sony PRS-700, iPhone	Re-gifting, ebaying it, donating it, sucking it up & display proudly when giver is coming to the house for a visit.....all viable options. Just depends on if you're the type that avoids making people feel bad at all costs, or the type that 'tells it like it is' & folks expect nothing less from you.

01-01-2010, 01:01 PM	#8
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	This year's crappy gift from Aunt Betty is next year's gift exchange item at the office party. Let 'em fight for it over a nice game of Dirty Santa!

01-01-2010, 01:19 PM	#9
Sweetpea Grand Sorcerer Posts: 9,707 Karma: 32763414 Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Krewerd Device: Pocketbook Inkpad 4 Color; Samsung Galaxy Tab S6	What is a really crappy present? Something you just would never use? Something that is bought as an afterthought (often cheap and broken either in the box or after 5 minutes of getting it)? Or something that is just so cheap that you wouldn't even think of buying it yourself (for yourself)? If it was the first, I'd just say it and ask if you could exchange it for something you could use. If it's the second or third, I'd thank the giver rather cold, and don't even look at it after unwrapping (hoping the hint hits home...)

01-01-2010, 01:28 PM	#10
Wetdogeared Storm Surge'n Posts: 5,776 Karma: 8213195 Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Lobster Capital Device: S0ny PRS-300/350/505/700/T1	My sister just bought me a rather expensive small kitchen appliance for Christmas. I will probably seldom use it, I don't have the counter space and if I store it I'll never use it. She has one just like it and thought I would like it also. She even offered me the receipt if I wanted to return it for something else. I graciously accepted it and will use it to cook dinner for her when she comes to visit this coming Monday. (Since she had personally picked out the present I just couldn't refuse it but, deep down, I wish I had taken the offer of the receipt so that I could exchange it for something more useful. I guess politeness overruled usefulness.)

01-01-2010, 03:12 PM	#14
PennyPie Cocoa & Toast...mmmmmm... Posts: 275 Karma: 1000 Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Ohio Device: Sony PRS-700, iPhone	We don't have a lot of family, so a gift for each of hubby's grandkids, an envelope with $ for his 2 kids, and a few gifts for a small # of friends is about all on our list. We each don't have a lot of 'wants', and normally, thruout the year we get what we want when we want it. So, for the 2 of us, just a shirt or sweater or some socks is pretty much it...just to have something to 'open' (oh yea...and a sappy, sentimental 'I love you so much' Xmas card!) We're not real big on the holidays, and it's just so overblown, so commercialized (yes, we all say that, I know...) My best gifts this year were bed pillows, collapsible kitchen food storage containers (for the boat), and a coffee mug with chihuahuas on it (I have a long-hair, 5 pounder - see photo below name at left) Less beloved gifts were graciously accepted, oohed over, and will one day go up on eBay. (not too soon, as givers all may see my offerings!)

01-01-2010, 03:20 PM	#15
kindlekitten Professional Adventuress Posts: 13,368 Karma: 50260224 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: The Olympic Peninsula on the OTHER Washington! (the big green clean one on the west coast!) Device: Kindle, the original! Times Two! and gifting an International Kindle	I gotta ask... what the hell is it?

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