Register Guidelines E-Books Today's Posts Search

Go Back   MobileRead Forums > E-Book General > Self-Promotions by Authors and Publishers

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 06-13-2015, 10:37 PM   #1
erslyman
Junior Member
erslyman began at the beginning.
 
Posts: 5
Karma: 10
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: NYC
Device: none
Poems That Make You Laugh

My book of funny pieces can be found here. Still a few free copies for Kindle http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00...=1&*entries*=0

sample:Giraffe

Short-horned colossus
It's perfectly obvious.
You're one part spindly legs,
Nine parts esophagus.

Lightning Bugs

In my backyard
They burn peepholes in the night
And take snapshots of my house.

Hailstorm

Lighting's omen.
Thunder's din.
The sky has lost its marbles!
May the tournament begin!
--ernest slyman
erslyman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-14-2015, 06:53 AM   #2
Dr. Drib
Grand Sorcerer
Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Dr. Drib's Avatar
 
Posts: 44,742
Karma: 55645321
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Peru
Device: Kindle: Oasis 3, Voyage WiFi; Kobo: Libra 2, Aura One
On the verse titled "Hailstorm," did you perhaps mean

Lightning's, rather than Lighting's.

Of course, it's your poem, and you can use whatever you wish.

----

I'm showing that the 'copies' are NOT free. You have it priced at $2.99

Last edited by Dr. Drib; 06-14-2015 at 06:56 AM.
Dr. Drib is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-14-2015, 07:07 AM   #3
AdamJ
Enthusiast
AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.AdamJ ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 47
Karma: 823398
Join Date: Jun 2015
Device: none
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
On the verse titled "Hailstorm," did you perhaps mean

Lightning's, rather than Lighting's.

Of course, it's your poem, and you can use whatever you wish.

----

I'm showing that the 'copies' are NOT free. You have it priced at $2.99
How can I buy it.. It's not expensive
AdamJ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-14-2015, 07:14 AM   #4
Dr. Drib
Grand Sorcerer
Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Dr. Drib ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Dr. Drib's Avatar
 
Posts: 44,742
Karma: 55645321
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Peru
Device: Kindle: Oasis 3, Voyage WiFi; Kobo: Libra 2, Aura One
Click on the link, create an account with Amazon, and buy it.

You do understand that I'm not the author.

You do understand this, don't you?
Dr. Drib is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-20-2015, 03:41 PM   #5
erslyman
Junior Member
erslyman began at the beginning.
 
Posts: 5
Karma: 10
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: NYC
Device: none
The following poem has been added to my ebook. corrections as well have been uploaded. The new edition, if you purchased previously, should be available within a day or so.

Reading in a Used Bookstore

What lies beneath shimmers up
and grasps the eye like a fish
and tosses it into the sea.
The cold wind blows
and lifts a page.
The ship rocks to and fro, teetering in my hand.
The swells, the surge,
the sunlit undulating
waves roll and roll,
beat against my brow.
The white majestic sails billow
and pop in my soul.
A tremor strolls along the deck,
spies inside me a spot of land.

(above poem was published in anglepoetry.com several months ago, UK Publication.)

(My favorite poem from this book is "The Law of Pie."

Just a portion. It's rather a long poem...Law of Pie

In the Bible Belt, there is the law of pie.
If you caught drunk driving in the Bible Belt,
you've got to recite Bible verses
and you can't eat pie for two weeks.
If you rob a bank, and kill two tellers,
you can't eat pie for six years.
If you cheat on your taxes you can't have pie
for six months. And if you and your wife fuss
and fight over nothing, like who shot the dog.
You stop making love.
One of you uglier than the other.
Here's some pie. You need it.

If you go to church
you deserve a piece of pie.
If you dressed up nice
and your shoes is shined, you get pie.
But if you don't pray or read your Bible,
if you use the Lord's name in vain,
if you womanizing, drunk, gambling,
cussing, you ain't getting no pie. Don't even ask.

Last edited by erslyman; 06-20-2015 at 03:43 PM. Reason: correction
erslyman is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
humor funny


Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
If this won't make you laugh, nothing will kuda Self-Promotions by Authors and Publishers 0 08-16-2012 04:27 PM
Make kids (and parents) laugh with crime-buster Leon Chameleon PI Just4kix Self-Promotions by Authors and Publishers 3 11-20-2011 08:25 AM
Books that make you laugh -- recommendations LJL Reading Recommendations 121 03-11-2010 08:50 PM
Please help me laugh LDBoblo Reading Recommendations 30 07-30-2009 02:34 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:04 AM.


MobileRead.com is a privately owned, operated and funded community.