"The Three Laws of Zombiotics" - STORIES, PSEUDO NON-FICTION, POETRY, ETC. NEEDED

[Dr. Drib]

Originally Posted by Solitaire1

Dr. Drib wrote as part of a post:



One possibility is that zombies don't see the same way that humans do. Rather, they use their eyes to "see" the heat from living bodies and then head in that general direction. That, combined with smell, would make it very difficult for living humans to hide among zombies since zombies have far less body heat than living humans.

I believe it's safe to conclude, then, that zombies cannot smell their own putrefaction, else they would be overcome to the point of incapacity and would not even be able to shamble, let alone breathe.

However, the reference to eyes presupposes that all zombies have eyes (which I believe to be an erroneous assumption); when, in fact, based upon injury - whether initiated in "pre-zombie" state or not - the fact remains that it is entirely conceivable that some zombies do NOT have eyes and thus would be incapable of sight.




Don

[jinlo]

Originally Posted by Solitaire1

One possibility is that zombies don't see the same way that humans do. Rather, they use their eyes to "see" the heat from living bodies and then head in that general direction.

This theory is indeed interesting and there are various ways to test it. Normally, Zombies won't chase another Zombie, but what if we soak a Zombie in gasoline, place it in a known infested area, light it up with a match and watch to see if the now much hotter Zombie attracts others? We could also try the opposite approach by covering a non-infected, living human with insulated material sufficient to block heat signatures to thermal optics. If we place the insulated subject in a Zombie's visual path and the Zombie shows no interest, we might have a new tool in Zombie avoidance techniques.

Originally Posted by Dr. Drib

However, the reference to eyes presupposes that all zombies have eyes (which I believe to be an erroneous assumption); when, in fact, based upon injury - whether initiated in "pre-zombie" state or not - the fact remains that it is entirely conceivable that some zombies do NOT have eyes and thus would be incapable of sight.

Good point. There are many well documented reports of Zombies with hollow eye sockets moving unerringly toward their intended victims. This would tend to diminish the importance of visual stimulus, even vision based on thermal variations. Still, clearly all Zombies have gone through significant alteration. We are no where near understanding all the chemical modifications in Zombie physiology. We are also somewhat in the dark in understanding the electronic impulses of the Zombie brain. Perhaps it's no longer necessary for a Zombie to have eyes in order to receive heat based signals of its surrounding environment. I wonder if a dangling optic nerve might be sufficient for a Zombie's brain to gain thermal related stimulus. Or maybe every cell of the Zombie gains some kind of capability to receive certain signals. A Zombie might walk around utilizing a sort of radar that is specifically tuned to a living human's normal body temperature.

[Greenkeeper]

In hearing you all discuss zombies in a calm and scientific manner, I feel compelled...for your own safety, mind you!..to point out the disturbing trend among zombie researchers. Namely, that those who partake in study of the living dead often wind up as living dead themselves. Be it a carelessly unlocked door, a dropped vial of bodily fluids, or even a clueless civilian trying to "rescue" a zombified loved one, inevitably the zombies take over even the most secure research facility.*

Continuing this thread will only lead to the destruction of the Mobileread forums, with every member either devoured or falling to infection. As the lone voice trying to point out this danger I will probably make it out, only to die towards the end of the story during my "I told you so" speech.

*See Resident Evil series, Night of the Living Dead 3, and Day of the Dead for examples of compromised research facilities.

[jinlo]

Originally Posted by Greenkeeper

In hearing you all discuss zombies in a calm and scientific manner, I feel compelled...for your own safety, mind you!..to point out the disturbing trend among zombie researchers. Namely, that those who partake in study of the living dead often wind up as living dead themselves. Be it a carelessly unlocked door, a dropped vial of bodily fluids, or even a clueless civilian trying to "rescue" a zombified loved one, inevitably the zombies take over even the most secure research facility.

That would never happen to us. We're much too careful. By the way, has anyone seen that last batch of Zombie ooze? I tried out that Veg-O-Matic thingy on a Zombie foot and it worked like a charm, but I put the ooze in a ketchup bottle from the fridge and now I can't find it. (heh, good thing I like mustard.)

Originally Posted by Greenkeeper

Continuing this thread will only lead to the destruction of the Mobileread forums, with every member either devoured or falling to infection.

Well you know, a good thing can't go on forever. If these forums have to end, that's as good a way as any, perhaps even the most fitting way.

Originally Posted by Greenkeeper

As the lone voice trying to point out this danger I will probably make it out, only to die towards the end of the story during my "I told you so" speech.

And it would serve you right, because no one likes the "I told you so" speech.

[Greenkeeper]

Originally Posted by jinlo

That would never happen to us. We're much too careful. By the way, has anyone seen that last batch of Zombie ooze? I tried out that Veg-O-Matic thingy on a Zombie foot and it worked like a charm, but I put the ooze in a ketchup bottle from the fridge and now I can't find it. (heh, good thing I like mustard.)

Great, see what I mean? If anyone needs me I'll be hiding in the air ducts.

[Stormchild]

nnnngggghhhh

[Dr. Drib]

Originally Posted by Stormchild

nnnngggghhhh

Don

[jinlo]

My question today focuses on when the Zombie infecting agent becomes transmittable. There are many variations for study, but at the moment, I'm interested in the point an infected individual becomes a true transmitter.

It's believed that receiving a skin breaking bite from a Zombie will pass the infection with a 100% transmission rate. What happens, however, if an individual receives a bite, but from a subject that is in a pre-Zombie stage.

For example, let us say a male subject has received several bites from various Zombies. There is no doubt the victim is infected. There is discoloration and swelling of the skin, not only around the wounds but across the entire body. Organs are failing, and startling alterations have taken hold in the blood composition. The infecting agent is clearly running rampant.

At this point, however, the infected individual is not a true Zombie. The subject has not experienced full cardiac arrest and subsequent reanimation. In fact, the individual may remain somewhat cognizant of his surroundings, able to recognize family members, and even capable of limited speech. Still, the agent that will eventually reanimate him is prevalent throughout his body.

Let us say this infected subject in a pre-Zombie stage bites a nurse during a struggle with medical personnel. What is the probability of transmission to the nurse? Will the nurse simply die of infection but not reanimate? Is recovery perhaps possible for the nurse if certain antibiotics are administered? If transmission does occur, could the infecting agent be susceptible to certain mutations due to its early stage of development?

Remember, the more we understand about Zombies now, the greater our chances of surviving the coming epidemic.

[Solitaire1]

I found this documentation of the progression of a zombie infection on YouTube:

[jinlo]

I've got something fun planned for this morning, especially for those that have been paying attention. We're going to see how well Zombies and humans maneuver in dark, confined, narrow spaces. Of course, the Zombies will be chasing a human and they will be doing so through a series of interconnected air ducts.

A human subject has already willingly agreed to enter a vast array of these passageways. We're going to place not one... not two... but three Zombies in those air ducts with him. To make things a bit more interesting, we will place the Zombies at three separate entrance points, but to be fair, there will be a fourth shaft that will serve as a free exit. It will be interesting to see if our human subject can make the right choice by avoiding the Zombies and finding the one clear path to freedom.

Maybe you're asking what could be gained by such an experiment. I could answer that it's important to understand how well Zombies move in cramped passages. I could also point out that it might be interesting to determine how quickly Zombies take notice of potential victims in darkened areas. In some ways, it's kind of like the "rat searching for cheese in a maze test," except in this case, we're using Zombies instead of rats and a human as opposed to cheese. Yes, all of these things could be important reasons for this test, but primarily we're doing it just to have some fun.

[Greenkeeper]

It's like a choose your own adventure! I try to escape through the north leftwardly air duct.

[jinlo]

Originally Posted by Greenkeeper

It's like a choose your own adventure! I try to escape through the north leftwardly air duct.

So our subject moves north. Is this really a surprise? I don't think so. I believe this is merely a natural physical reaction to Earth's magnetic field. In a dark, narrow passage, the subject goes with instinct, and that instinct may be affected by the magnetic pull to the north.

There are now two questions to consider. Do Zombies also have similar instincts, deep sensations that might be in tune with the magnetic field? If so, it's a good chance our Zombies are also headed north.

The second question involves the degree with which our test subject trusts the fairness of this test. Does he believe we would give him a fair chance to escape or have we stacked the deck against him? If he believes we don't have his best interests in mind, heading north might not be the wisest choice. I mean seriously, if we knew his instinct was to head north and we kind of hoped he'd meet up with a Zombie, where we would put one? I'd say the northern intake duct would be a good choice.

With all of this in mind, our fearless test subject hears a clanking noise in the direction he's crawling. It could just be a loose wall grate and a path to freedom, or it could be the thunking of a Zombie elbow against the metal duct work.

[Greenkeeper]

You're good...too good.

I believe you may be on to something with zombies being affected by Earth's magnetic field. The undead, due to injuries and decay, often lack eyes altogether, as has been discussed. With the sensitive microscopic hairs in the ears likely degraded as well and the observed lack of feeling (or at least a sense of pain) that zombies are known to have, this only leaves the sense of smell. Navigation by scent alone maybe help find prey, but for general shambling around a sort of internal compass would be most valuable. Perhaps with their other senses dulled the subtle pull of the poles becomes easier to recognize, giving the undead a point of reference by which to move.

This is bad news, by the way. As zombies are drawn northward they are likely to enter colder climes. Zombies which freeze in the winter are preserved from decay and can come back in the spring thaw, making total elimination difficult if not impossible.

With all this in mind, exiting the airducts from the north is still the best bet, as any zombies in the ducts would be drawn to it as well and are therefore behind me. Turning back would be suicide. With luck if there is a zombie ahead it too will be drawn north and hopefully stay ahead of me. Chances are an exit could be found before any zombies run across me.

[jinlo]

And so it seems that our test subject has escaped by utilizing the long held belief that it's always better to have a Zombie behind you than ahead of you. Congratulations are in order.

On a side note, I've always found the tactics of monster escape especially interesting. When dealing with slow moving monsters like crippled Zombies, a foot dragging mummy, or a confused Frankenstein's monster, I believe it's better to be in the open on level ground where the best option is simply to out distance the pursuing monster.

This, however, is not the best method when trying to escape the mega-monsters--the 400 foot behemoths like Godzilla. I believe the best course of action is to choose an escape route that runs perpendicular to the monster's current path. If he's heading north, go east or west. Let him chase the panicked mob and let him pass you by. Remember, no matter how slow it appears Godzilla is moving, his long stride will offset the speed of the fastest runner. And for God's sake, don't get on a train that's headed in his direction.

As for Zombies, there are always options. Remaining undetected is usually the safest bet, but when that's unavoidable know a Zombie's limitations as well as your own.

[Solitaire1]

Originally Posted by jinlo

And so it seems that our test subject has escaped by utilizing the long held belief that it's always better to have a Zombie behind you than ahead of you. Congratulations are in order.

On a side note, I've always found the tactics of monster escape especially interesting. When dealing with slow moving monsters like crippled Zombies, a foot dragging mummy, or a confused Frankenstein's monster, I believe it's better to be in the open on level ground where the best option is simply to out distance the pursuing monster.

This leads to a question: What is the best tactic for outrunning the above listed creatures?

- Option 1: A straight path, where your goal is simply to outrun those pursuing you.

- Option 2: A changing path, where you quickly alter direction with the hope that those pursuing you will have trouble reacting to the changes in direction.

Originally Posted by jinlo

This, however, is not the best method when trying to escape the mega-monsters--the 400 foot behemoths like Godzilla. I believe the best course of action is to choose an escape route that runs perpendicular to the monster's current path. If he's heading north, go east or west. Let him chase the panicked mob and let him pass you by. Remember, no matter how slow it appears Godzilla is moving, his long stride will offset the speed of the fastest runner. And for God's sake, don't get on a train that's headed in his direction.

It is likely the best tactic is to unleash another monster (I'm a fan of Gamera) and let the two to fight it out. While that is going on you can travel a safe distance away (but avoid trains and choppers). The key is to get as far away as possible, and scatter the population as much as possible so there is no central group to target. Since the monsters are territorial, it is likely they will focus on each other and ignore the running crowds.

Originally Posted by jinlo

As for Zombies, there are always options. Remaining undetected is usually the safest bet, but when that's unavoidable know a Zombie's limitations as well as your own.

It seems like what is needed is an effective physical barrier against zombies. Anything that exceeds the potential strength of zombies, even with tools, would seem to be the key.

One barrier that might be effective is a massively high steel wall that is slight angled outward to prevent the zombies from climbing it. It should be effective as long as the zombies don't develop primitive technology like a catapult (Don't let them see "Monty Python And The Holy Grail"!).