Blurb pet peeves

[Cinisajoy]

Since this was mentioned in another thread, I thought I would start a thread of things that irritate me in a blurb
1. Mentioning that you can read free in Kindle Unlimited. My reason is if I am on the book page I already know this. Amazon mentions it above the blurb. It is also in the price box.
Twice is enough.

2. If one puts #1 Bestseller on Amazon. Ok if your name is Grisham, Roth, James, Cussler, I would believe it. But not if you made #1 in a very small subcat. More so, if it was a free subcat.

3. From NYT bestseller used to bother me but now it means hey a readable book.

4. Using a review in the blurb. I want your words not someone else's. Side note to this one, authors that copy and paste reviews from one book to another in the editorial reviews.

Also if an author uses a review of mine without my permission, they will lose that review.

On my first two points, I always think the author is assuming that the reader is too dumb to do any research or read the book page. Since the author is assuming his readers are dumb, does he write dumb?

Oh and last turn off is bad grammar in the blurb. I assume the book will be the same way.

So dear authors when writing a blurb assume your potential buyer can read. Otherwise that potential buyer may think you can't write.

[cromag]

All of the above, plus I don't like really long blurbs. I'm looking for a quick reason to read a story, not another story.


But, mistakes in grammar and spelling are guaranteed sale-killers.

[issybird]

Another one, off the top of my head: giving a synopsis of the plot.

[theducks]

I never bought a book because it was on some idiots best seller list.

Gimme the BEEF (Synopsis)
If I have to scroll it... It is to long

Or
A really good, sink the hook, solidly... Teaser .
If it can be done in a Paragraph or two .

If I want a Review. I will go to a review site. (or ask my friends)
Same goes for the Author Bio.

[JSWolf]

Originally Posted by Cinisajoy

3. From NYT bestseller used to bother me but now it means hey a readable book.

50 Shades of Gray was a NYT bestseller (not that long ago) and it is unreadable garbage. Just because lemmings bought the book doesn't make it readable.

[Cinisajoy]

On 50 shades, I know numerous people that found the book absolutely fantastic. I haven't read all of it but I would call it simplistic writing.
But you consider that it wasn't written for the educated. It was written for fans of fanfic of Twilight.
Different demographic.
But this thread is about blurbs.

[Dr. Drib]

Originally Posted by JSWolf

50 Shades of Gray was a NYT bestseller (not that long ago) and it is unreadable garbage. Just because lemmings bought the book doesn't make it readable.

I think Jon means (if he thought about this a bit further):


...."and, in my opinion, it is unreadable garbage..."

[Gudy]

A blurb that goes on and on about how great the book is but doesn't tell me what the whole thing is about. This is a "never touch anything by this author again" level offense.

[Bart Page]

There is nothing worse than a "blurb" that basically give you the entire story arc.

[JSWolf]

Originally Posted by cromag

All of the above, plus I don't like really long blurbs. I'm looking for a quick reason to read a story, not another story.


But, mistakes in grammar and spelling are guaranteed sale-killers.

Actually, the blurbs are not always written by the author. A lot of times the publisher has someone else write the blurb so if there are errors in the blurb, it's not always the author's fault.

So if the book is not self-published, you cannot blame the author and be sure you are correct.

[JSWolf]

Originally Posted by theducks

I never bought a book because it was on some idiots best seller list.

I've found that a lot of award winning books aren't worth the pixels it takes to announce the award online.

[Cinisajoy]

Originally Posted by JSWolf

Actually, the blurbs are not always written by the author. A lot of times the publisher has someone else write the blurb so if there are errors in the blurb, it's not always the author's fault.

So if the book is not self-published, you cannot blame the author and be sure you are correct.

Jon,
The OP was written with self-published authors in mind.

[Katsunami]

Originally Posted by cromag

All of the above, plus I don't like really long blurbs. I'm looking for a quick reason to read a story, not another story.

I've had a long blurb spoil a book. While browsing I saw a new book by R.A. Salvatore, the guy who wrote Drizzt Do'Urden, in the Forgotten Realms setting.

"Hey, a new book. I didn't know he had out another one."

*read blurb*

...

FRAAAAACK.

I hadn't read all of the Drizzt books, and by reading that blurb, I now know that

Spoiler:

all of the characters of the books, such as Bruenor, Catti-Brie and so on will die at some point. That is expected, as they are adventurers, and even if they wouldn't be killed or something, they don't have Drizzt's life span. However, I also know that a few books later, all of them will be revived, alive again, about a hundred years into the future.

Damn you, blurb.

[Hitch]

Originally Posted by Katsunami

I've had a long blurb spoil a book. While browsing I saw a new book by R.A. Salvatore, the guy who wrote Drizzt Do'Urden, in the Forgotten Realms setting.

"Hey, a new book. I didn't know he had out another one."

*read blurb*

...

FRAAAAACK.

I hadn't read all of the Drizzt books, and by reading that blurb, I now know that

<snip the spoiler>

Damn you, blurb.

My pet peeve is people using the word "blurb" when they mean "description." A blurb, traditionally, is not the damned description. It's a BLURB. A blurb is a comment or praise from some authority, whether it's Stephen King or the NYTimes' Book Review. Yes--before anyone jumps in--I know that the OED allows that "blurb" can be a short, eulogistic description by a publisher. Nonetheless, in the biz, historically, a blurb is not the description, (as in the description field on Amazon's website); it's the praise.

Offered solely FWIW.

@Cinsajoy:

You said:

Also if an author uses a review of mine without my permission, they will lose that review.

A review from where, exactly? I ask because Amazon (and B&N, etc.) state pretty clearly that once you've written a review on their site, they own it, not you, so an author wouldn't be doing anything spectacularly wrong in using that content. Do you have a review site, is that the thing? Usually, at least, in trade publishing, a published review, is pretty much fair game.

If, in this thread, we are discussing descriptions, I have a list of stuff that will put me off a book in a New York second.

Hitch

[Cinisajoy]

Originally Posted by Hitch

My pet peeve is people using the word "blurb" when they mean "description." A blurb, traditionally, is not the damned description. It's a BLURB. A blurb is a comment or praise from some authority, whether it's Stephen King or the NYTimes' Book Review. Yes--before anyone jumps in--I know that the OED allows that "blurb" can be a short, eulogistic description by a publisher. Nonetheless, in the biz, historically, a blurb is not the description, (as in the description field on Amazon's website); it's the praise.

Offered solely FWIW.

@Cinsajoy:

You said:



A review from where, exactly? I ask because Amazon (and B&N, etc.) state pretty clearly that once you've written a review on their site, they own it, not you, so an author wouldn't be doing anything spectacularly wrong in using that content. Do you have a review site, is that the thing? Usually, at least, in trade publishing, a published review, is pretty much fair game.

If, in this thread, we are discussing descriptions, I have a list of stuff that will put me off a book in a New York second.

Hitch

That is odd because there is an option at Amazon to delete a review you have posted.
So yes at Amazon.
Can you please point me to exactly where Amazon owns the review? It does not say that anywhere on the reviewing page nor is there a pop-up.