Sentence Fragments?

[kcmay]

I notice them when they're awkwardly placed or too frequently used. I use them, myself, from time to time, but I agree with the notion that they should be "punchy." Overly used, they stop being punchy.

[Penforhire]

I notice most broken rules when they used too often. I appreciate it when it adds something, done artistically. Cormac McCarthy, I'm looking at you.

[Under the Covers]

Originally Posted by GraceKrispy

Where I think it's not great:
She was the one that had let them down with her rush to publish. With her overwhelming need for recognition

Where I think it's ok:
The door flew open and there he stood. Tek. No smile today. All business.

I agree with you. Fragments become tiring to read. When I'm reading good writing, I'm completely swept up and lost in the writer's created world, but when I encounter a fragment such as in your first example, it jolts me out of that world while I re-read it to make sure I haven't misread it.

Writing, while self-expression for the author, is ultimately an experience for the readers. The whole point is for the readers to grasp the meaning at first read. If the author is set on following a personal set of rules of the road, the readers often end up having to re-read sections just to understand the basic "sentence." At that point, the author's self-expression becomes a tad narcissistic.

[meromana]

Originally Posted by Under the Covers

I agree with you. Fragments become tiring to read.

Exactly. Several of you have made that point--when they're "punchy" and unexpected, fragments work; when they're used in excess, it's painful and tedious. Sorry, but I think the "Bleak House" paragraphs are an example of just that: overuse of fragments. Intense overuse. To me, it became a long, tiresome list, rather than an entertaining, varied description, punctuated by pithy fragments. Just MHO.

Originally Posted by nomesque

"She was the one that had let them down with her rush to publish. Her need for recognition. Her desire for revenge against Daddy. She let them all down and they would all suffer."

Now this, on the other hand, was a well-balanced mix. Much better than the original...again, IMHO.

--Maria

[Under the Covers]

Originally Posted by nomesque

"She was the one that had let them down with her rush to publish. Her need for recognition. Her desire for revenge against Daddy. She let them all down and they would all suffer."

Now to get people to say/write "the one WHO . . ." since it's a person, not a thing.

[nomesque]

Originally Posted by Under the Covers

Now to get people to say/write "the one WHO . . ." since it's a person, not a thing.

Good point. I missed that on my rewrite!

[Under the Covers]

Originally Posted by nomesque

Good point. I missed that on my rewrite!

Karma for being such a good sport -- I certainly didn't mean to offend you -- it's just one of those things I've been running into a lot lately and correcting.

I guess it also irritates me a bit because we have been objectified and turned over time from "people" into "consumers" -- picture little Pac-Man game images -- and on into "things" now with our language.

[nomesque]

Originally Posted by Under the Covers

Karma for being such a good sport -- I certainly didn't mean to offend you -- it's just one of those things I've been running into a lot lately and correcting.

Aww, thanks - but I certainly wasn't offended. A bit irritated at myself for missing that point (I edit and write manuals for a living), but then it occurred to me that I wasn't focusing on fixing the whole text, just displaying MY idea of OK sentence fragments.

Originally Posted by Under the Covers

I guess it also irritates me a bit because we have been objectified and turned over time from "people" into "consumers" -- picture little Pac-Man game images -- and on into "things" now with our language.

Something I noticeably shudder at (I know because my manager's noticed it) is 'resources', as in, "we'll need to put a couple more resources onto the project." NO!!! PEOPLE, goshdarnit all to heck and may Phil, the Lord of Insufficient Light, smack your botty with his spoon for all eternity, you dehumanising piece of vomit!!!!

Ahem. Sentence fragments?

[Under the Covers]

Originally Posted by nomesque

Something I noticeably shudder at (I know because my manager's noticed it) is 'resources', as in, "we'll need to put a couple more resources onto the project." NO!!! PEOPLE, goshdarnit all to heck and may Phil, the Lord of Insufficient Light, smack your botty with his spoon for all eternity, you dehumanising piece of vomit!!!!

Ahem. Sentence fragments?

Ah, yes. Sentence fragments. Back on topic. Detour over.

[JwkOKC]

Originally Posted by R. Reed

I have used sentence fragments to show that a character's thoughts are jumbled, or the character is in shock. It can be effective, but you have to follow the rules most of the time so breaking them is effective.

I'm a very latecomer to this thread, but these two sentences triggered a memory for me.

Long long ago in a place that's far, far away, I aced a freshman English composition class intended to teach us the rules for clear writing. The instructor's plan, announced during the initial class session, was to assign us one specific rule each week, such as "avoid repetition" for example, and we were to write a 500-word theme illustrating same.

At the end of the session I buttonholed the graduate student serving as our instructor, and declared my intention to illustrate each rule by blatantly violating it. "An ambitious effort, Mister Kyle," he replied, " but I'll respect it. If you're successful you'll get an A; if not, you'll fail. There'll be no in between."

I thanked him and proceeded to carry it out. Every paper got the A, as did my end of term mark. It was quite an effort, of which I was somewhat arrogantly proud.

The following year my girl friend, also a journalism student, asked to copy my work in order to get her own good grade in the required course. Unfortunately she had a different instructor, didn't inform him of the plan in advance, and made a few small "corrections" in the text to make it a bit closer to the rule.

She flunked, of course.

My point? One should never violate the rules by accident -- which means that you must know them, before deciding to do so. And to be effective, you can't do it too frequently.

Sorta like Lord Chesterfield's advice to his son, to not insult anyone accidentally.

[Historiann]

It's interesting that this topic should be raised today as just last night I started reading a nonfiction book in which the author uses sentence fragments. Repeatedly. Multiple times on every page. Indeed, she uses them to such an extent that she just appears lazy, as if she decided it was too much trouble to convert her research notes into coherent, elegant sentences. It's the first time I've encountered sentence fragments as a defining characteristic of an author's style. Is this becoming more common in both fiction and nonfiction?

[HarryT]

Originally Posted by JwkOKC

The following year my girl friend, also a journalism student, asked to copy my work in order to get her own good grade in the required course.

Did your college not have a prohibition on plagiarism? Most colleges and universities are pretty clear that it's not permitted.

[pdurrant]

Originally Posted by HarryT

Did your college not have a prohibition on plagiarism? Most colleges and universities are pretty clear that it's not permitted.

In this case it seems that the plagiarism carried its own punishment.

[HarryT]

Originally Posted by pdurrant

In this case it seems that the plagiarism carried its own punishment.

Very true!

[murg]

Originally Posted by HarryT

Did your college not have a prohibition on plagiarism? Most colleges and universities are pretty clear that it's not permitted.

We don't call it plagiarism. We call it research.