Seriously thoughtful Let's be civil, please

[pshrynk]

I've not been around much lately, being on vacation and in areas where the Interwebs haven't much reached, yet. So, it was somewhat surprising to return and find that there is a lot of rancor going on, especially about politics and such.

Please refer to our Guidelines, which specifically state that we as MobileRead ask all of you as members to treat each other with politeness. Before hitting "enter," please review what you have typed and ask yourself if you would like to say that to your mother (or your best friend if you have that sort of relationship with Mom). If not, please don't send it.

MobileRead is supposed to be all about the joy of reading and doing so on electronic devices. There really is no place nor is there any reason for insults, name calling, personal attacks, or any other sort of incivility.

Thanks for your understanding and anticipated cooperation.

pshrynk (moderator)

[vivaldirules]

Life has been much better for me (and probably others) since I started using the Ignore Thread option under Thread Tools. I simply don't have the internal fortitude to always restrain myself and this helps me avoid that problem entirely. Now if I could just figure out how to deal with cats.

[MickeyC]

[QUOTE=pshrynk;866177]I've not been around much lately, being on vacation and in areas where the Interwebs haven't much reached, yet. So, it was somewhat surprising to return and find that there is a lot of rancor going on, especially about politics and such.

Please refer to our Guidelines, which specifically state that we as MobileRead ask all of you as members to treat each other with politeness. Before hitting "enter," please review what you have typed and ask yourself if you would like to say that to your mother (or your best friend if you have that sort of relationship with Mom). If not, please don't send it.

MobileRead is supposed to be all about the joy of reading and doing so on electronic devices. There really is no place nor is there any reason for insults, name calling, personal attacks, or any other sort of incivility.

Thanks for your understanding and anticipated cooperation.

pshrynk (moderator)[/QUOTE

Well said!

[desertgrandma]

So.......I just read that happy_terd is no longer with us, because of all the rancor and political crap being spewed. We've lost another valuable member because of poisonous posts.

Heres the thing.

As this is a world wide forum, there are bound to be those who disagree with the US policies, beliefs, etc.

What I don't understand is why these inflammatory threads are shut down IMMEDIATELY.

Spare me the "well, can't we discuss this rationally?"

No......I can't discuss my country rationally with someone who knows nothing about it, or , even worse, someone who lives here, enjoys its benefits, and still chooses to trash it.

You say "But I've read the papers and they said........" "I saw the video and it showed......" "I read this book and it clearly stated............."

Please.

If I were to start a thread on the atrocities muslims commited here in the US, or in their own countries, to each other and outsiders, if I were to comment on their murderous threats against Christian and Jewish religions, what would happen?

If I were to start a thread on those who do not believe in war, make fun of their "all you need to do is just not pick up a gun" attitude, would that be tolerated?

No.........and rightly so. So why.........when my country is attacked.......do the mods just say "play nice"???

MobileRead should be about book readers and all their assorted uses, etc. The lounge should be just that....a place for friends to gather, joke around, relieve the stresses of the days/ week.

Its not a place for any kind of political discussion, or religious discussion, any more than it is a place for gay bashing or race relations.

[Donnageddon]

Originally Posted by desertgrandma

MobileRead should be about book readers and all their assorted uses, etc. The lounge should be just that....a place for friends to gather, joke around, relieve the stresses of the days/ week.

Its not a place for any kind of political discussion, or religious discussion, any more than it is a place for gay bashing or race relations.

In this, desertgrandma is completely correct. If people want to talk politics, PLEASE go to a political forum!

I love mobileread too much to see it become just another political flame war forum.

[desertgrandma]

Please understand, everyone.........

I am seriously asking that political or religious discussions of any kind be permanently banned from MobileRead.

Go discuss your conspiracy theories, or complaints, or the reasons you do or don't believe in Christianity, Judiaism, or whatever somewhere else. Lord knows there are enough places on the 'net to do so.

There should be one place in this world where we can ALL come together and discuss books, ereaders, or our 'short and curlies" (please see THAT appropriate post.)

We should be able to support one another in our times of sorrow and stress, or help look for books, or tell our stupid jokes without having to wade thru that.

[Billjr13]

Hear Hear! I have lately been avoiding posting and visiting because of the angry tone being directed at people in some threads. I just want to have fun here again.

[phenomshel]

Originally Posted by desertgrandma

So.......I just read that happy_terd is no longer with us, because of all the rancor and political crap being spewed. We've lost another valuable member because of poisonous posts.

Heres the thing.

As this is a world wide forum, there are bound to be those who disagree with the US policies, beliefs, etc.

What I don't understand is why these inflammatory threads are shut down IMMEDIATELY.

Spare me the "well, can't we discuss this rationally?"

No......I can't discuss my country rationally with someone who knows nothing about it, or , even worse, someone who lives here, enjoys its benefits, and still chooses to trash it.

You say "But I've read the papers and they said........" "I saw the video and it showed......" "I read this book and it clearly stated............."

Please.

If I were to start a thread on the atrocities muslims commited here in the US, or in their own countries, to each other and outsiders, if I were to comment on their murderous threats against Christian and Jewish religions, what would happen?

If I were to start a thread on those who do not believe in war, make fun of their "all you need to do is just not pick up a gun" attitude, would that be tolerated?

No.........and rightly so. So why.........when my country is attacked.......do the mods just say "play nice"???

MobileRead should be about book readers and all their assorted uses, etc. The lounge should be just that....a place for friends to gather, joke around, relieve the stresses of the days/ week.

Its not a place for any kind of political discussion, or religious discussion, any more than it is a place for gay bashing or race relations.

Well, I guess that explains why I had a message from him telling me to "take it easy". I couldn't figure out what I'd been ranting about that he'd be telling me that. It wasn't til I read this thread that I realized it was a goodbye .

I've missed the whole thing too, been busy with school and work. No idea what happened, don't particularly WANT to know - but I do know I'll miss Happy .

[GraceKrispy]

On another board Iʻm on, they had this issue with heated political posts in the lounge area. Their decision was to make a separate issues and politics board. Any political posts posted on the lounge were immediately moved.

Now this kept the lounge free from politics, but definitely made for a heated and volatile politics board! but those who were into it frequented it, and everyone else stayed blissfully away.

The vast majority of people on that board live in the US, and it still is volatile. I think in a completely international board such as this, the discussions could and do get even more heated as we add country loyalties and misconceptions in as well.

[desertgrandma]

Originally Posted by Billjr13

Hear Hear! I have lately been avoiding posting and visiting because of the angry tone being directed at people in some threads. I just want to have fun here again.

Originally Posted by phenomshel

Well, I guess that explains why I had a message from him telling me to "take it easy". I couldn't figure out what I'd been ranting about that he'd be telling me that. It wasn't til I read this thread that I realized it was a goodbye .

I've missed the whole thing too, been busy with school and work. No idea what happened, don't particularly WANT to know - but I do know I'll miss Happy .

Originally Posted by GraceKrispy

On another board Iʻm on, they had this issue with heated political posts in the lounge area. Their decision was to make a separate issues and politics board. Any political posts posted on the lounge were immediately moved.

Now this kept the lounge free from politics, but definitely made for a heated and volatile politics board! but those who were into it frequented it, and everyone else stayed blissfully away.

The vast majority of people on that board live in the US, and it still is volatile. I think in a completely international board such as this, the discussions could and do get even more heated as we add country loyalties and misconceptions in as well.

Everyone has a right to their opinion on anything. However, anyone with any passion or loyalty at all to their country, political preference or religion will respond in kind to real or perceived taunts.

This is why you cannot have a "civil, rational or respectful" discussion on same, unless, of course, you have no loyalty or passion about anything.

[Sparrow]

I agree with most of the above.
But I think it's the situations where a remark is completely innocuous to the poster, but is taken as barbed by a reader that are difficult to deal with. I'm not sure how occasional misunderstandings can be avoided.

[neilmarr]

Just been away for a couple of weeks myself (hospital), so this thread has taken me by surprise. One of the joys of MR has always been its members' respect for each other and the friendly banter when a thread might -- good heartedly -- stray from its intended point.

All open subject-dedicated forums go through unwelcome and uncomfortable periods of heated tempers and badly considered words from time to time (usually when religion and politics rear their ugly heads). The trick is to ignore these intrusions and carry on regardless. The only way to stop this behaviour all together is for the forums to be more heavily moderated ... and neither members nor moderators want that, I'm sure. We're adults and shouldn't need to be told that mutual respect and some self-control is the order of the day at a valuable, non-controversial site like MR.

Here's hoping that Turd and other well-loved pals here are lurking and will be back in the fold when things return to normal.

Best wishes. Neil

[beppe]

Please, dear GraceKrispy, be so kind to take away that banner from your signature.

This thread reafforce my intention of taking part to MR more and more, not only because books and readers interest me but because of the quality of the members.

The forum itself is directly concerned with culture.The highest form of culture. Books, writings, ideas, emotions. We also live here and now. With all the advantages and dangers of our times and places.
If this forum was on feline pets (as it might seem to a superficial observers) there would be much easier reasons to quarrel.

There are so many issues and so many interests and manipulating forces, and technology gives so much resonance. Everything is faster, cliche are so useful and confortable ...

It is a time of great material confort, expecially for us that can indulge in fancy things like ebooks.Therefore we all tend to cultivate and cuddle our egos, our rightness. We like to be smart, to see through propaganda. To be different. We like to be splendid.

Most of the real life issues are very simple in their core although very complex in the conseguences. The core is quite often made of two sides. In and out (of the walls of the town under siege f.i.). Pro or against, and so on. This ambiavelency between issue core and its conseguences leads the more simpleminded among us to a third way so that they can be right anyway the cooky crumbles. In doing so - on purpose if sneaky, unadvertily if just underequipped - they do take one of the two sides, but it appears (to themselves only) that they are neutral and therefore right by default, and the others wrong (by default), the other others can then be conveniently neglected. It is an old and very upsetting pattern. And I am sure that you do not need a graphical explanation. If so feel free to contact me by PM only.

How do we avoid all this BS ? If we follow the "correctness approach", which is very tempting, being intrisecally "right", we fall into the simpleminded trap that I just described. If we take stands then the culture environment of this forum evaporates. Happy_terd is the most recent example of instant evaporation. And we all lost. I just read his good bye speech and it confirmes the impression I got of him of being an excellent person. A big useless loss.

It does not exist a mechanical way. pshrynk's starting post indicates the only possible way: no insults, name calling, personal attacks, or any other sort of incivility.

I would add to the list "provocative motions". At least for the time being. In the hope that culture and civility help each other.

[GeoffC]

Originally Posted by Billjr13

Hear Hear! I have lately been avoiding posting and visiting because of the angry tone being directed at people in some threads. I just want to have fun here again.

My thoughts exactly ...



The ignore thread option is not really an option in some cases, for instance where a bunch of posts within a thread drive off at a tangent. Hopefully at some stage they will converge backwards again.

I've been away for a week, doing other things; so am shocked (though not surprised) to find that this thread has been necessary - all I know is a cryptic two word message from h_t, implying he's leaving (I have to ask myself, was he blaming me!?);
I finally discover some half chapter and part verse (though short on full detail) on his profile.....

Hell, I like it here in MR, the comaraderie, the wit, the friendships; I find it safer to take a break sometimes and come back another day - it is true, there is a kind of compulsion that brings me back...There's only one other forum that I am active upon, I would hate to lose both these opportunities to 'speak' with different people from all parts of The World.



Chocolate anybody ? ....

[GeoffC]

Now I've had time to look and pick up some of the things I've missed out on ....

One question ....

Threads closed for a reason - why are they not deleted in their entirety .... ?