Humor Twain, Mark: Extracts from Adam's Diary (Illustrated). v2. 11 Nov 2012

[GrannyGrump]

EXTRACTS FROM ADAM’S DIARY
by Mark Twain (Samuel Langhorne Clemens) (1835 – 1910)
with 45 Illustrations by F. Strothmann (1879 – 1958)
First published 1904

The text of this book, published before 1923, is in the public domain world-wide because the author died more than 100 years ago. The illustrations are in the public domain in countries where copyright is Life+50, and in the USA.

Mark Twain is most noted for his novels, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1876), and its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1885), the latter often called "the Great American Novel." Among dozens of titles, some of his works include The Innocents Abroad, A Tramp Abroad, Roughing It, Life on the Mississippi, The Prince and the Pauper, A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, and many more.

This comic short story is one of a series of books Twain wrote concerning the story of Adam and Eve, including Eve's Diary, That Day In Eden, Eve Speaks, Adam's Soliloquy, and the Autobiography of Eve.

The piece gives a humorous account of Genesis. In the form of a diary, Adam (based on Twain himself) describes how Eve (modeled after his wife Livy) gets introduced into the Garden of Eden, and how he has to deal with “this new creature with the long hair”. It begins with the introduction of Eve, described as an annoying creature with a penchant for naming things, which Adam could do without. It moves on to detail Eve eating the apple and finding the infant Cain, a perplexing creature which Adam can not figure out. He devotes his ironically scientific mind to demystifying Cain's species, thinking it a fish, then a kangaroo, then a bear. After much time passes, he figures out it is a human, like himself. Eventually, despite his initial deep annoyance with Eve, Adam finds himself in love with her.

The work is humorous and ironic, and gives a new spin on Genesis: few people have considered what life must have been like for Adam, who is discovering everything anew; the account does not consider God's role at all.
—adapted from Wikipedia

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AN EXCERPT:

Been examining the great waterfall. It is the finest thing on the estate, I think. The new creature calls it Niagara Falls — why, I am sure I do not know. Says it looks like Niagara Falls. That is not a reason; it is mere waywardness and imbecility. I get no chance to name anything myself. The new creature names everything that comes along, before I can get in a protest. And always that same pretext is offered — it looks like the thing. There is the dodo, for instance. Says the moment one looks at it one sees at a glance that it “looks like a dodo.” It will have to keep that name, no doubt. It wearies me to fret about it, and it does no good, anyway. Dodo! It looks no more like a dodo than I do.

... The naming goes recklessly on, in spite of anything I can do. I had a very good name for the estate, and it was musical and pretty — GARDEN-OF-EDEN. Privately, I continue to call it that, but not any longer publicly. The new creature says it is all woods and rocks and scenery, and therefore has no resemblance to a garden. Says it looks like a park, and does not look like anything but a park. Consequently, without consulting me, it has been new-named — NIAGARA FALLS PARK. This is sufficiently high-handed, it seems to me. And already there is a sign up:

KEEP OFF THE GRASS

My life is not as happy as it was.

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Although this is a short book, the file is large due to 45 full-page illustrations (If you have a large-screen reader, try viewing in two-page mode, so the text can display beside the pictures.) Minor textual corrections. Formatted curly quotes, emdashes, italics. Embedded fonts for titling. No text-wrapping.

Be sure to read the Author's Note. Happy reading!

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ETA: After doing Adam's Diary and Eve's Diary, I have googled unsuccessfully for the other Twain Adam & Eve books in public domain versions: That Day In Eden, Eve Speaks, Adam's Soliloquy, and the Autobiography of Eve . If anyone knows of any sources, it would be much appreciated. Thanks.

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Edit: uploaded version 2, with some text correction and minor formatting changes. Previous downloads 84.

[GrannyGrump]

Uploaded version 2, with minor text correction and some small formatting changes.
Thanks to AlexBell for inspiring me to check this one too!