03-19-2014, 03:21 PM | #7621 |
Guru
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Karma: 5565888
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Townsend, WI
Device: Palm TX, PRS-505 (BLUE)
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Shoe
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03-19-2014, 04:41 PM | #7622 |
binomial: homo legentem
Posts: 1,061
Karma: 25222222
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Alabama, USA
Device: iriver Story HD; Archos 80 G9
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George is home alone when he hears a knock on the front door. He opens it to find two sheriff's deputies there.
George: "Is there is a problem, officers?" Deputy: "Sir, are you married?" George: "Yes, I am." Deputy: "May we see a picture of your wife, sir?" George: "Sure, I have one right here." George hands over a photo of his wife. The two deputies take a moment to look it over and then nod to each other. Deputy: "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, sir. But it looks like your wife has been hit by a truck." George: "Yeah, but she has a great personality and is an excellent cook." |
03-19-2014, 11:53 PM | #7623 |
Home Guard
Posts: 4,729
Karma: 86721650
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Alpha Ralpha Boulevard
Device: Kindle Oasis 3G, iPhone 6
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...with 400 children and a crop in the field. |
03-20-2014, 12:50 AM | #7624 |
Surfin the alpha waves ~~
Posts: 24,295
Karma: 459220161
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New Jersey
Device: Jetbook Lite & Mini, Nook STR, Kobo, Hanvon N516, Kindle 2, Androids
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Big wheel keep on turnin' ... please!
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03-20-2014, 09:32 AM | #7625 |
Opsimath
Posts: 12,344
Karma: 187123287
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand
Device: Sony PRS-650, iPhone 5, Kobo Glo, Sony PRS-350, iPad, Samsung Galaxy
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Policeman came to my door the other day, and said;
'Where were you between 5 and 6?' I replied; 'Kindergarten' and he got angry. Can you imagine? Stitchawl |
03-20-2014, 03:36 PM | #7626 |
Force-Aware Elf
Posts: 4,757
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Valinor
Device: Kindle 4 w/SO
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03-20-2014, 05:36 PM | #7627 |
Snoozing in the sun
Posts: 10,137
Karma: 115423645
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Device: iPad Mini, Kobo Touch
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Another one for the dog people (especially water dogs):
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03-20-2014, 05:52 PM | #7628 |
Bah, humbug!
Posts: 39,073
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Chesapeake, VA, USA
Device: Kindle Oasis, iPad Pro, & a Samsung Galaxy S9.
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Norton did that today. We've had nothing but rain and snow since forever, and today he got into some mud in the back yard, came back in and jumped up on my lap.
Know why pugs are so cute? That's so you won't kill them. |
03-20-2014, 10:51 PM | #7629 |
Is that a sandwich?
Posts: 8,189
Karma: 100500000
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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03-21-2014, 06:43 AM | #7630 |
Close to the Edit!
Posts: 9,797
Karma: 267994408
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Device: Kindle Oasis, Amazon Fire 8", Kindle 6"
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"Sarcasm will get you nowhere in life," my boss told me.
"Well, it got me to the 'International Sarcasm' finals in Santiago, Chile in 2009," I informed him. "Really?" he asked. "No," I replied. |
03-21-2014, 12:46 PM | #7631 |
Home Guard
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Karma: 86721650
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Alpha Ralpha Boulevard
Device: Kindle Oasis 3G, iPhone 6
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03-22-2014, 08:19 PM | #7632 |
Is that a sandwich?
Posts: 8,189
Karma: 100500000
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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03-23-2014, 03:38 PM | #7633 |
Wizard
Posts: 1,820
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: France
Device: (Sony (J) PRS 650), Kobo Mini, Kobo Glo HD
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03-26-2014, 06:36 PM | #7634 |
Close to the Edit!
Posts: 9,797
Karma: 267994408
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Device: Kindle Oasis, Amazon Fire 8", Kindle 6"
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03-26-2014, 07:16 PM | #7635 |
Surfin the alpha waves ~~
Posts: 24,295
Karma: 459220161
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New Jersey
Device: Jetbook Lite & Mini, Nook STR, Kobo, Hanvon N516, Kindle 2, Androids
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So that's where it went!!!
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