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Old 08-10-2009, 04:47 PM   #31
vivaldirules
When's Doughnut Day?
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Originally Posted by Sparrow View Post
The Republic of Molossia is "a sovereign, independent nation-state, located in and completely surrounded by the United States, making it an enclave nation", apparently.
Here's an interesting and relevant tidbit from that entry:

"Several items are banned in Molossia, including firearms, incandescent light bulbs, catfish, onions, walruses and anything from Texas, except Kelly Clarkson."
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Old 08-10-2009, 04:58 PM   #32
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Double Springs, Alabama, secedes from the Union every year. It's a weekend of lawless fun for kids of all ages!

Mostly it is eating, shopping, and drinking.
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Old 08-10-2009, 05:12 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward View Post
We only despise people who tell us to sit down and shut up...or use sneaky ways to rob us.
Which, in my experience, mostly means other Texans.
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Old 08-10-2009, 06:55 PM   #34
wodin
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sparrow View Post
The Republic of Molossia is "a sovereign, independent nation-state, located in and completely surrounded by the United States, making it an enclave nation", apparently.
Those Molossians have their stuff together as exemplified by their stated policy of "Several items are banned in Molossia, including firearms, incandescent light bulbs, catfish, onions, walruses and anything from Texas, except Kelly Clarkson"
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Old 08-10-2009, 06:56 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by wodin View Post
Those Molossians have their stuff together as exemplified by their stated policy of "Several items are banned in Molossia, including firearms, incandescent light bulbs, catfish, onions, walruses and anything from Texas, except Kelly Clarkson"

Opps, vivaldirules beat me to it!
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Old 08-10-2009, 07:02 PM   #36
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Originally Posted by vivaldirules View Post
Me, too. I think the Texan in my jeans genes ended with my Dad (6' 2") and brother (6' 4"). Maybe I was adopted - from Oklahoma.
Here now, we're not all that short up here. I will admit that my parents are though mom is 5' and dad is 5'3" they had sons though the shortest of which is 5'11" and the tallest my younger brother is 6'3".

Just remember that if ya'll secede I'll be swimming the river south to join you. So hold you fire damn it, and I mean rat now.
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Old 08-11-2009, 01:31 AM   #37
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Originally Posted by bamboozled View Post
Pretty accurate ... although my wife is from New Mexico and people ask if she had to get a Visa to come to Texas.
when I moved to NM, I got asked all the time if I had a Visa ready to go. Hey, when the (former) VP of the US doesn't even realize it's a state...

Quote:
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Y'all can say what you want about Texas, but we Hawaiians have the only bona fide US royalty, and the only royal palace on US soil!
here here!! I mean HULO HULO!!

He Hawai'i au, mau a mau!
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Old 08-11-2009, 02:45 AM   #38
HansTWN
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Have you heard the joke about a Texan and a German farmer talking over a beer? The Texan says: "When I jump into my pickup truck it takes me a whole day of driving to get from one end of my property to the other!". The German farmer replies: "I had a car like that once!"
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Old 08-11-2009, 07:41 AM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HansTWN View Post
Have you heard the joke about a Texan and a German farmer talking over a beer? The Texan says: "When I jump into my pickup truck it takes me a whole day of driving to get from one end of my property to the other!". The German farmer replies: "I had a car like that once!"



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Old 08-11-2009, 02:15 PM   #40
UncleDuke
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the key to understanding texans is to ignore 99% of what they say since they don't believe it either, the rest is the bs that they believe to be true
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Old 08-11-2009, 04:55 PM   #41
Greg Anos
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Texas Etiquette:

Never ask a person if he's from Texas.

If he is, he'll let you know soon enough.

If he isn't, you don't want to embarrass him.



You know, if Texans were so obnoxious and bothersome, you'd think the rest of the US would be glad to see us go. Yet many of them seem to blow a fuse at the idea of getting rid of Texas. I wonder why?
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Old 08-11-2009, 05:45 PM   #42
vivaldirules
When's Doughnut Day?
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Don't try telling a Texan the joke about "I knew a couple that was married so long they were on their second bottle of Tabasco." They'll just politely look at you like you were from another planet.
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Old 08-11-2009, 09:16 PM   #43
Greg Anos
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Originally Posted by vivaldirules View Post
Don't try telling a Texan the joke about "I knew a couple that was married so long they were on their second bottle of Tabasco." They'll just politely look at you like you were from another planet.
Of course they would. After all, you're talking about a marriage, not a one night stand....



(Joke hint - For every 3 pounds of meat (1 1/2 Kilos), I use half a cup of chili powder in my chili recipe...)
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Old 08-11-2009, 11:48 PM   #44
phenomshel
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No, no, you've ALL got it wrong. You don't UNDERSTAND Texans...you just love us the way we are!!!!!
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Old 08-12-2009, 12:16 AM   #45
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oh. haha. nice one there. saying 'Hi' to all the Texans out here!

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