E-newspapers will be ready, when...

TadW · 03-30-2007, 09:24 AM

From TechMan of the Pittsburgh Post - Gazette: a witty list of requirements for electronic newspaper to capture the market completely:

It is cheap enough that you can leave it on the bus for someone else to read. And cheap enough that you don't worry about losing it.
You can hold if over your head in a rainstorm and then dry it out and read it again.
You can roll it up and swat the dog gently. Or swat a fly not so gently.
Your wife can pull out the sports section and give it to you.
You can crinkle it up and pack your glassware for moving. Or use it to train your puppy.
You can start a fire in your fireplace with it.
You can write on it.
You can cut out the recipes and put them in the pages of Joy of Cooking.
You can roll Silly Putty on it and pick up the comics.
You can fold it in quarters to do the crossword puzzle.
You can make a hat out of it.
You can cut out a Dilbert comic strip and hang it in your cubicle.

yvanleterrible · 03-30-2007, 10:40 AM

I think we're due for that flexible display they're touting about. When it comes, what's next will be my answer.

1. They can have an eink bolted to every back of the bus' seats.
2. Flexible plastic is water resitent.
3. He'll be knocked out and really quiet afterwards. (sorry I love dogs and don't hit them)
4. Well! She'll just have to wait her turn won't she? Or get her own?
5. Considering it's thickness, you can just pile em up to the right spacing (don't worry about weight, I don't)
6. You can ( my neighbors hate me now)
7. I got a nice set of felt pens.
8. You can still print the recipes and bind them all to make a much better presentation!!!
9. They have to invent eink silly putty.???
10.Buy a smaller reader for that.
11.Yes you could. French chefs already wear tubes.
12.I'd buy a giant plastic eink screen to make a cubicle with and plug in my computer to display whatever movie of picture I wish .

Imagine that buying eink in 4 by 8 sheets, cut them up and weld a plug to an edge and add a computer?

It's nice to dream!

UncleDuke · 03-30-2007, 11:22 AM

a great newspaper should not only be a good trash can liner and a bottom for a bird cage and something you can housebreak a dog on, it should be an excellent fish wrapper.

Steven Lyle Jordan · 03-31-2007, 05:43 PM

Y'know, I've noticed that about half of these definitions essentially equate the Newspaper to the status of trash.

(Things that make you go... Hmmm...)

yvanleterrible · 04-01-2007, 11:09 AM

That is exactly what they're doing wrong with it. It should be recycled instead. Appraising virtue to wastefullness is not ethical isn't it?

NatCh · 04-01-2007, 01:19 PM

Well, it's dumb anyway.

03-30-2007, 09:24 AM	#1
TadW Uebermensch Posts: 2,583 Karma: 1094606 Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Italy Device: Kindle	E-newspapers will be ready, when... From TechMan of the Pittsburgh Post - Gazette: a witty list of requirements for electronic newspaper to capture the market completely: It is cheap enough that you can leave it on the bus for someone else to read. And cheap enough that you don't worry about losing it. You can hold if over your head in a rainstorm and then dry it out and read it again. You can roll it up and swat the dog gently. Or swat a fly not so gently. Your wife can pull out the sports section and give it to you. You can crinkle it up and pack your glassware for moving. Or use it to train your puppy. You can start a fire in your fireplace with it. You can write on it. You can cut out the recipes and put them in the pages of Joy of Cooking. You can roll Silly Putty on it and pick up the comics. You can fold it in quarters to do the crossword puzzle. You can make a hat out of it. You can cut out a Dilbert comic strip and hang it in your cubicle.

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03-30-2007, 10:40 AM	#2
yvanleterrible Reborn Paper User Posts: 8,616 Karma: 15446734 Join Date: May 2006 Location: Que Nada Device: iPhone8, iPad Air	I think we're due for that flexible display they're touting about. When it comes, what's next will be my answer. 1. They can have an eink bolted to every back of the bus' seats. 2. Flexible plastic is water resitent. 3. He'll be knocked out and really quiet afterwards. (sorry I love dogs and don't hit them) 4. Well! She'll just have to wait her turn won't she? Or get her own? 5. Considering it's thickness, you can just pile em up to the right spacing (don't worry about weight, I don't) 6. You can ( my neighbors hate me now) 7. I got a nice set of felt pens. 8. You can still print the recipes and bind them all to make a much better presentation!!! 9. They have to invent eink silly putty.??? 10.Buy a smaller reader for that. 11.Yes you could. French chefs already wear tubes. 12.I'd buy a giant plastic eink screen to make a cubicle with and plug in my computer to display whatever movie of picture I wish . Imagine that buying eink in 4 by 8 sheets, cut them up and weld a plug to an edge and add a computer? It's nice to dream!

03-30-2007, 11:22 AM	#3
UncleDuke books & doughnuts Posts: 882 Karma: 37857 Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: usa Device: sony reader, kindle2	a great newspaper should not only be a good trash can liner and a bottom for a bird cage and something you can housebreak a dog on, it should be an excellent fish wrapper.

03-31-2007, 05:43 PM	#4
Steven Lyle Jordan Grand Sorcerer Posts: 8,478 Karma: 5171130 Join Date: Jan 2006 Device: none	Y'know, I've noticed that about half of these definitions essentially equate the Newspaper to the status of trash. (Things that make you go... Hmmm...)

04-01-2007, 11:09 AM	#5
yvanleterrible Reborn Paper User Posts: 8,616 Karma: 15446734 Join Date: May 2006 Location: Que Nada Device: iPhone8, iPad Air	That is exactly what they're doing wrong with it. It should be recycled instead. Appraising virtue to wastefullness is not ethical isn't it?

04-01-2007, 01:19 PM	#6
NatCh Gizmologist Posts: 11,615 Karma: 929550 Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Republic of Texas Embassy at Jackson, TN Device: Pocketbook Touch HD3	Well, it's dumb anyway.

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