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Old 02-21-2013, 01:18 PM   #6136
gridlewak
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An old nun who was living in a convent next to a construction site noticed the coarse language of the workers and decided to spend some time with them to correct their ways.
She decided she would take her lunch; sit with the workers;
She put her sandwich in a brown bag and walked over to the spot where the men were eating.
Sporting a big smile, she walked up to the group and asked: "And do you men know Jesus Christ?"
They shook their heads and looked at each other. very confused..
One of the workers looked up into the steelworks and yelled out, "Anybody up there know Jesus Christ?"
One of the steelworkers yelled down , "Why?"
The worker yelled back,
" Cause his mom's here with his lunch."
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Old 02-21-2013, 01:28 PM   #6137
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I always wondered how they fit a seal in those boxes.
It's rather easy, actually. You wrap the box around the seal and applies pressure. Using pressure in food conservation is a new trend - but unfortunately the method often causes the seal to break and the food is ruined
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Old 02-21-2013, 03:16 PM   #6138
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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I have a large seashell collection, which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world.
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Old 02-21-2013, 04:42 PM   #6139
pilotbob
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I have a large seashell collection, which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world.
I have a huge retirement fund currently being held at many Las Vegas casinos... some day I will go there and cash out.
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Old 02-21-2013, 07:45 PM   #6140
yvanleterrible
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I bought a box of animal crackers and it said on it "Do not eat if seal is broken." So I opened up the box, and sure enough...
Quote:
Originally Posted by pilotbob View Post
I always wondered how they fit a seal in those boxes.
Well, actually those crackers were made to feed several animals. The seal got them first.
Wait! Could it be that the cracker shaped like a seal was broken?
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Old 02-21-2013, 08:34 PM   #6141
pilotbob
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Wait! Could it be that the cracker shaped like a seal was broken?
Sure, that's exactly the joke. I just tried to coat tail.

BOb
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Old 02-22-2013, 06:42 PM   #6142
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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I hate it when I'm about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.
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Old 02-23-2013, 06:29 AM   #6143
orlok
Getting back into it
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If anyone's interested, I'm selling one of my eggs!

(FYI it's been fertilized, is six years old and he is called Dave)
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Old 02-23-2013, 01:13 PM   #6144
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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Seeing a spider isn't the problem. It becomes a problem when it disappears.
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Old 02-24-2013, 06:48 AM   #6145
orlok
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"What do we get from the hen?" asks the teacher.

"Eggs," says Little Susie.

"Good. And what do we get from the sheep?"

"Wool," says Little Susie.

"Good. And what do we get from the cow?"

"Homework," says Little Johnny.
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Old 02-24-2013, 06:51 AM   #6146
Bilbo1967
Not scared!
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Why do Marxists only drink herbal tea?

Spoiler:
Because proper tea is theft!
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Old 02-24-2013, 01:08 PM   #6147
PeterT
Taking a break; Fed up
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Why do Marxists only drink herbal tea?

Spoiler:
Because proper tea is theft!
Booboo booooo
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Old 02-24-2013, 03:25 PM   #6148
samhy
Wizard
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Seeing a spider isn't the problem. It becomes a problem when it disappears.
So true if it's a big one
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Old 02-24-2013, 03:49 PM   #6149
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, if you do find one, what's your plan?
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Old 02-24-2013, 03:52 PM   #6150
odiakkoh
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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, if you do find one, what's your plan?
Die without my pants around my ankles lol.
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