Register Guidelines E-Books Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Go Back   MobileRead Forums > Miscellaneous > Lounge

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 02-12-2013, 03:54 PM   #6061
Pookeysgirl
Wizard
Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Pookeysgirl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 1,705
Karma: 12696746
Join Date: May 2010
Device: K3, Kobo Mini
A golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer's ball beside him. Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him

'Arrgh! What happened?' the Leprechaun asked.

'I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball,' the golfer says.

'Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?'

'Thank God, you're all right!' the golfer answers in relief. 'I don't want anything,

I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize.' And the golfer walks off.


'What a nice guy,' the Leprechaun says to himself. I have to do something for him. I'll give him the three things I would want. A `great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life.'



A year goes by and the golfer is back. On the same hole, he surprisingly hits a bad drive into the woods and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him.

'Twas me that made ye hit the ball here, 'the little guy says. 'I just want to ask ye, how's yer golf game?'

'My game is fantastic!' the golfer answers. I'm an internationally famous golfer now.' He adds, 'By the way, it's good to see you're all right.'

'Oh, I'm fine now, thank ye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell me, how's yer money situation?'


'Why, it's just wonderful!' the golfer states. 'When I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out 100 euro notes I didn't even know were there!'


'I did that fer ye also.' And tell me, how's yer sex life?'

The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says shyly, 'It's OK.'

C'mon, c'mon now,' urged the Leprechaun, 'I'm wanting to know if I did a good job. How many times a week?'



Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, 'Once, sometimes twice a week.'



'What??' responds the Leprechaun in shock. 'That's all? Only once or twice a week?'



'Well,' says the golfer, 'I figure that's not bad for a Catholic priest in a small parish.’
Pookeysgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:32 PM   #6062
yvanleterrible
When books can fly!
yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.yvanleterrible ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
yvanleterrible's Avatar
 
Posts: 8,516
Karma: 3606000
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Que Nada
Device: Kobo Mini in my lunchbox.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kennyc View Post
"Mars Needs Moms" By Disney.



Drats! I've just dated my maturity level!

Last edited by yvanleterrible; 02-12-2013 at 09:35 PM.
yvanleterrible is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 11:05 PM   #6063
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Fbone's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,341
Karma: 67805067
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Searching ...
I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
Fbone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-13-2013, 08:09 AM   #6064
red_phoenix
Flameless Phoenix
red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.red_phoenix ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
red_phoenix's Avatar
 
Posts: 16,064
Karma: 66359840
Join Date: Dec 2011
Device: Sony PRS-T1
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pookeysgirl View Post
A golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer's ball beside him. Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him

'Arrgh! What happened?' the Leprechaun asked.

'I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball,' the golfer says.

'Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?'

'Thank God, you're all right!' the golfer answers in relief. 'I don't want anything,

I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize.' And the golfer walks off.


'What a nice guy,' the Leprechaun says to himself. I have to do something for him. I'll give him the three things I would want. A `great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life.'



A year goes by and the golfer is back. On the same hole, he surprisingly hits a bad drive into the woods and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him.

'Twas me that made ye hit the ball here, 'the little guy says. 'I just want to ask ye, how's yer golf game?'

'My game is fantastic!' the golfer answers. I'm an internationally famous golfer now.' He adds, 'By the way, it's good to see you're all right.'

'Oh, I'm fine now, thank ye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell me, how's yer money situation?'


'Why, it's just wonderful!' the golfer states. 'When I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out 100 euro notes I didn't even know were there!'


'I did that fer ye also.' And tell me, how's yer sex life?'

The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says shyly, 'It's OK.'

C'mon, c'mon now,' urged the Leprechaun, 'I'm wanting to know if I did a good job. How many times a week?'



Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, 'Once, sometimes twice a week.'



'What??' responds the Leprechaun in shock. 'That's all? Only once or twice a week?'



'Well,' says the golfer, 'I figure that's not bad for a Catholic priest in a small parish.’
red_phoenix is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-13-2013, 11:39 AM   #6065
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Fbone's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,341
Karma: 67805067
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Searching ...
I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
Fbone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-13-2013, 03:57 PM   #6066
badgoodDeb
Wizard
badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
badgoodDeb's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,402
Karma: 12122505
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicago outskirts
Device: Palms, K1, K3, K4s, iPad, iPhone 5
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fbone View Post
I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
Very nice!! I remember him .... (well, the name)....
badgoodDeb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-13-2013, 10:20 PM   #6067
Bookpossum
Snoozing in the sun
Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Bookpossum ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Bookpossum's Avatar
 
Posts: 7,135
Karma: 73006223
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Device: Kobo Touch (mine), Sony PRS-T1 (husband's)
Today's Short Reading from the Bible... from Genesis:

"And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth".

Then he made the earth round... and he laughed and laughed and laughed...
Bookpossum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2013, 07:23 AM   #6068
maianhvk
whimsy
maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.maianhvk ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
maianhvk's Avatar
 
Posts: 2,766
Karma: 88021697
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Vietnam
Device: Kindle 3 WiFi
So I’ve decided that my Wi-Fi will be my valentine. Idk, we just have this connection.
maianhvk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2013, 07:57 AM   #6069
orlok
Getting back into it
orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.orlok ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
orlok's Avatar
 
Posts: 8,325
Karma: 227265654
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Device: Kindle Fire HD, Kobo glo
Quote:
Originally Posted by maianhvk View Post
So I’ve decided that my Wi-Fi will be my valentine. Idk, we just have this connection.
*Groan*
orlok is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2013, 10:03 AM   #6070
GeoffC
Chocolate Grasshopper ...
GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
GeoffC's Avatar
 
Posts: 26,947
Karma: 17036296
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Device: Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW
I've noticed a few £500.00+ USB Flash drives on Amazon.co.uk this afternoon, but even this one is a joke !?

GeoffC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2013, 12:23 PM   #6071
pilotbob
Grand Sorcerer
pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.pilotbob ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
pilotbob's Avatar
 
Posts: 19,600
Karma: 11337367
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Tampa, FL USA
Device: Kindle Touch
Quote:
Originally Posted by maianhvk View Post
So I’ve decided that my Wi-Fi will be my valentine. Idk, we just have this connection.
I hope your connection is protected... wouldn't want to get a virus!
pilotbob is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2013, 01:48 PM   #6072
badgoodDeb
Wizard
badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
badgoodDeb's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,402
Karma: 12122505
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicago outskirts
Device: Palms, K1, K3, K4s, iPad, iPhone 5
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffC View Post
I've noticed a few £500.00+ USB Flash drives on Amazon.co.uk this afternoon, but even this one is a joke !?

Looks kinda cute! But yeah, that price tag is a joke. It *is* actually listed as available in the US, for $50 for the 64G one.
badgoodDeb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2013, 02:49 PM   #6073
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Fbone ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Fbone's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,341
Karma: 67805067
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Searching ...
"My sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners!"
Fbone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2013, 02:08 AM   #6074
WT Sharpe
Grand Muckity-Muck
WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
WT Sharpe's Avatar
 
Posts: 32,740
Karma: 97312994
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Chesapeake, VA, USA
Device: Kindle Paperwhite, iPad Air, iPod Nano. Other devices gathering dust.
Love is like a game of cards.

You start off with two hearts and a diamond.

You end up wishing for a club and a spade.

Last edited by WT Sharpe; 02-15-2013 at 09:37 AM.
WT Sharpe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2013, 02:24 AM   #6075
Stitchawl
Opsimath
Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.Stitchawl ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Stitchawl's Avatar
 
Posts: 11,606
Karma: 176936053
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand
Device: Sony PRS-650, iPhone 5, Kobo Glo, Sony PRS-350, iPad, Samsung Galaxy
Can you believe it?
This guy wins $181 million in the lottery and then finds the
love of his life just 2 days later.

*Talk about LUCK!!! wow!*


Stitchawl
Stitchawl is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Good Day Eh!! :-) Gedvondur Introduce Yourself 12 07-22-2010 12:16 AM
Classic Is there a way to lighten the background? rlsamson Barnes & Noble NOOK 3 06-30-2010 04:56 PM
Add from the Mobile Read Library? danwdoo Calibre 6 05-01-2010 07:14 PM
Read-in-Microsoft-Reader 1.1.3 add-in released Alexander Turcic Reading and Management 2 02-20-2006 03:47 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:10 AM.


MobileRead.com is a privately owned, operated and funded community.