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#5611 |
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Desperation
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 7,216
Karma: 208692942
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Device: Kindle Fire HD, Kobo glo
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So I knocked another golf ball at his head. |
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#5612 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 4,212
Karma: 59108411
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NJ
Device: Searching ...
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If you see a plate of bacon running down the street screaming “HELP ME!” please return it to me. It’s totally overreacting.
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Enthusiast
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#5613 |
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Desperation
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 7,216
Karma: 208692942
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Device: Kindle Fire HD, Kobo glo
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I'll never forget the last thing my wife said to me when she died last week - "See you in Heaven darling."
Since then I've robbed a bank, murdered my boss and set the local orphanage on fire. |
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#5614 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 4,212
Karma: 59108411
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NJ
Device: Searching ...
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The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
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#5615 |
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binomial: homo legentem
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Karma: 15917206
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Alabama, USA
Device: iriver Story HD; Archos 80 G9
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#5616 | |
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Not scared!
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Karma: 18839366
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Solihull, UK
Device: Sony 650, Sony T2, Xoom, Nexus 7, Nook ST
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Quote:
She sued him for sexual harrassment!
__________________
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. Mark Twain My early and invincible love of reading, . . . I would not exchange for the treasures of India. Edward Gibbon |
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#5617 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 4,212
Karma: 59108411
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NJ
Device: Searching ...
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#5618 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 4,212
Karma: 59108411
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NJ
Device: Searching ...
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The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.
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#5619 |
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Grand Sorcerer
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Karma: 4829359
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Tampa, FL USA
Device: Kindle Touch
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I thought I was the only one who didn't get that one.
__________________
Never ascribe to malice that which is adequately explained by incompetence. --Napoleon Bonaparte |
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#5620 |
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My own Cosmic Overlord
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Karma: 3013268
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New Jersey
Device: Jetbook Lite, Acer Netbook, a new Android and an old Android
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I suspect if she was slicing bacon he was lucky she only sued him!
__________________
My first backlist story to be ebooked, free at Smashwords. My second. And my newest. |
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#5621 |
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When books can fly!
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Karma: 3048822
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Que Nada
Device: Kobo Mini in my lunchbox.
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#5622 |
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Desperation
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 7,216
Karma: 208692942
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Device: Kindle Fire HD, Kobo glo
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This new Thesaurus isn't just terrible, it's also terrible.
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#5623 |
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Not scared!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 6,523
Karma: 18839366
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Solihull, UK
Device: Sony 650, Sony T2, Xoom, Nexus 7, Nook ST
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I won't explain it, because having to explain jokes is just sad. I'm pretty sure plenty of people did get it.
I would say though, that I've been in situations where somebody tells a joke that I don't get. I normally just laugh politely and move on. It's a kind of good manners thing.
__________________
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. Mark Twain My early and invincible love of reading, . . . I would not exchange for the treasures of India. Edward Gibbon |
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#5624 | |
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Grand Sorcerer
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 18,789
Karma: 4829359
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Tampa, FL USA
Device: Kindle Touch
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Quote:
BOb
__________________
Never ascribe to malice that which is adequately explained by incompetence. --Napoleon Bonaparte |
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#5625 |
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Snoozing in the sun
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Karma: 65742439
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Device: Kobo Touch (mine), Sony PRS-T1 (husband's)
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The bacon slicer was a person slicing bacon, not a machine.
__________________
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose. (Garrison Keillor) |
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