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Old 11-14-2012, 05:54 PM   #5611
orlok
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I was driving today when this guy in front give me the middle finger.

So I knocked another golf ball at his head.
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Old 11-15-2012, 09:58 PM   #5612
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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If you see a plate of bacon running down the street screaming “HELP ME!” please return it to me. It’s totally overreacting.
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Old 11-16-2012, 11:52 AM   #5613
orlok
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I'll never forget the last thing my wife said to me when she died last week - "See you in Heaven darling."

Since then I've robbed a bank, murdered my boss and set the local orphanage on fire.
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Old 11-16-2012, 01:58 PM   #5614
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
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Old 11-16-2012, 03:28 PM   #5615
steven522
binomial: homo legentem
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Originally Posted by orlok View Post
See you in Heaven ...




Wife: "Walking into the forest late at night sure is scary."
Husband: "You think it's scary now? I'll be walking back out of here alone."
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Old 11-16-2012, 03:33 PM   #5616
Bilbo1967
Not scared!
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The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
Did you hear about the butcher who stuck his finger in the bacon slicer to see what would happen?

She sued him for sexual harrassment!
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Old 11-16-2012, 10:43 PM   #5617
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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Did you hear about the butcher who stuck his finger in the bacon slicer to see what would happen?

She sued him for sexual harrassment!
No, I didn't.
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Old 11-16-2012, 10:44 PM   #5618
Fbone
Is that a sandwich?
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The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.
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Old 11-16-2012, 11:29 PM   #5619
pilotbob
Grand Sorcerer
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No, I didn't.
I thought I was the only one who didn't get that one.
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Old 11-16-2012, 11:32 PM   #5620
cromag
Surfing the alpha waves ~
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I suspect if she was slicing bacon he was lucky she only sued him!
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Old 11-17-2012, 08:47 AM   #5621
yvanleterrible
When books can fly!
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I suspect if she was slicing bacon he was lucky she only sued him!
Now, THAT was funnier than the original joke!
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Old 11-17-2012, 12:15 PM   #5622
orlok
Getting back into it
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This new Thesaurus isn't just terrible, it's also terrible.
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Old 11-17-2012, 04:18 PM   #5623
Bilbo1967
Not scared!
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Originally Posted by Fbone View Post
No, I didn't.
Quote:
Originally Posted by pilotbob View Post
I thought I was the only one who didn't get that one.
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Originally Posted by yvanleterrible View Post
Now, THAT was funnier than the original joke!
I won't explain it, because having to explain jokes is just sad. I'm pretty sure plenty of people did get it.

I would say though, that I've been in situations where somebody tells a joke that I don't get. I normally just laugh politely and move on. It's a kind of good manners thing.
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Old 11-17-2012, 04:20 PM   #5624
pilotbob
Grand Sorcerer
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Originally Posted by Bilbo1967 View Post
I won't explain it, because having to explain jokes is just sad. I'm pretty sure plenty of people did get it.

I would say though, that I've been in situations where somebody tells a joke that I don't get. I normally just laugh politely and move on. It's a kind of good manners thing.
I assume it is a cultural or language thing. Many jokes are a playon words or pronunciation of words. I see you are from the UK... so I know that applies. I don't feel bad that I didn't get it. But, it would be nice if you did explain it.

BOb
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Old 11-17-2012, 04:58 PM   #5625
Bookpossum
Snoozing in the sun
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The bacon slicer was a person slicing bacon, not a machine.
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