Doest thou deplore non-readers?

[odiakkoh]

I personally think there were better excuses than parents in a car accident.

I don't really care if people are readers. My husband and I don't like the same genres so we never have anything to talk about on that subject anyway. We have other common interests so I doubt this marriage is doomed. My important thing is at least tolerating animals. You don't have to love them but I've never found myself getting close to anyone who disliked them.

[miguel1626]

Originally Posted by HarryT

Different people have different interests. Many of my friends spend all their free time watching TV. Am I to be "pitied" because I prefer to read instead? It's simply a different interest. I think there's a little "intellectual snobbery" in the view that reading is somehow a "superior" hobby to other forms of entertainment. If you enjoy doing something, that's what matters.

Have to agree with you on this, Harry. I read a lot, but I also play a lot of videogames (which are frowned upon by many people). And lots of my (very smart) co-workers are very light readers (when they read at all).

Nonetheless, I usually find it easier to relate to heavy readers and/or gamers. I'm a poor conversationalist in general, and a common interest is a great facilitator.

BTW, reading habits have never been an issue on dating (and my own habits have probably hindered me, rather than helped).

[Sydney's Mom]

Originally Posted by wyndslash

i heard that MTV is canceling Jersey Shore, so maybe there's hope yet

But they replaced it with Honey Boo Boo!!!

[Sydney's Mom]

Originally Posted by Wald07

Sydney's Mom: Death. Everytime. No contest.

Noooooo!

[Andrew H.]

Originally Posted by HarryT

Different people have different interests. Many of my friends spend all their free time watching TV. Am I to be "pitied" because I prefer to read instead? It's simply a different interest. I think there's a little "intellectual snobbery" in the view that reading is somehow a "superior" hobby to other forms of entertainment. If you enjoy doing something, that's what matters.

Yeah, I pretty much agree with this (although there is "snobbery" (not always the intellectual version, though) among groups who are really into any activity, from skiing to music.

And - as mentioned upthread - readers vary widely; I'm likely to have much less in common with an avid reader who reads certain genres I don't than with a non-reader who is interested in other activities I enjoy. Or who watches television shows similar to books I enjoy, for that matter.

[nookkatz]

Originally Posted by tubemonkey

[wyndslash]

Originally Posted by Sydney's Mom

But they replaced it with Honey Boo Boo!!!

...what's a Honey Boo Boo? o_o;

[owly]

I'm kind of flummoxed when it comes to a woman I know. She works at a library yet she doesn't read or watch movies and I don't think she even watches TV much either.

[Bookpossum]

Maybe she's hooked on the Internet.

When my husband and I started our relationship, he had just bought the house we still live in. It contained some built-in bookcases which he had already filled. So he built me a wonderful floor-to-ceiling bookcase (I confessed I always had an ambition to have one). It didn't take me long to get that stuffed to the gills, and we have each since bought more bookcases. Our problem now is that we don't have any more floorspace for more bookshelves, so e-readers came along in the nick of time.

We do have clean-outs from time to time and donate the results to our favourite charity shop (RSPCA) but mostly we can't bear to part with our books, just in case we ever get the time to reread them.

We do have other interests in common, and some we pursue separately, but I couldn't imagine living with someone who didn't love books and animals.

[Prestidigitweeze]

Originally Posted by HarryT

Different people have different interests. Many of my friends spend all their free time watching TV. Am I to be "pitied" because I prefer to read instead? It's simply a different interest. I think there's a little "intellectual snobbery" in the view that reading is somehow a "superior" hobby to other forms of entertainment. If you enjoy doing something, that's what matters.

I look upon reading as exercise for the imagination (in the sense the imagination and other aspects of the mind must work actively to create scenes and spatial coherence instead of having it done by visual media).

And with that in, uh, mound, I try to talk to disinclined friends about reading as I might mention my interest in exercise to a sedentary person -- diplomatically, with the aim to avoid proselytizing, condescension or any other mode that could discourage someone or make them defensive. If they already have obstacles to overcome, why add to that?

Sometimes a girlfriend will seem oblivious to my suggestions while we're dating, only to pick them up later when we're not together any more. Presumably, she needed the space to consider or accept what I'd recommended, which is understandable.

[Anabran]

Some men have a more narrow focus.

His lack of reading apparently did not, in any way, impede his ability to convince a random woman to Follow a "stranger in his 50's" to his abode by
Merely "chatting her up".

Perhaps he should be **Writing **books instead.

[voracious71]

While I don't necessarily understand non-readers, it wouldnt be the thing that would make or break a relationship.

I have lots of other interests too and have always been sort of a lone wolf in my reading habits anyway.

Now, if the other person was derogatory about me loving to read, then there might be an issue.

[Prestidigitweeze]

As a teenager, I used to think that beautiful homes and lofts devoid of all but self-help and coffee table books exemplified the shallowness of modern culture. The eyes of one owner whose kid I knew seemed to have the hollow allure of the TV screens he worshiped.

Now that e-readers and digital music libraries exist, the lack of clutter has taken on a different meaning: The polished wood and nigh-empty walls seem more mental easel than void.

Or else my childish assumption was utterly wrong, and the people with homes uncluttered by books, sheet music and recordings were not necessarily shallow at all. Perhaps to assume so is to confuse a particular kind of materialism for intellectual depth, which means, ironically enough, that the person who makes the assumption is being shallow.

[Andrew H.]

Originally Posted by Prestidigitweeze

As a teenager, I used to think that beautiful homes and lofts devoid of all but self-help and coffee table books exemplified the shallowness of modern culture. The eyes of one owner whose kid I knew seemed to have the hollow allure of the TV screens he worshiped.

When I graduated and was able to afford an apartment without a roommate, I was very happy to be able to move my books out of my bedroom and into the living room because I had become so tired of the visual distraction of having so many books always in my sight. Once I got a house, I moved them (with the exception of a handful of large format art books) into my office and into my (finished) basement. Both rooms with books are cozy...but books really do produce a cluttered effect that it's nice to be able to avoid sometimes.

Now that e-readers and digital music libraries exist, the lack of clutter has taken on a different meaning: The polished wood and nigh-empty walls seem more mental easel than void.

You can also put up artwork on the walls...

Or else my childish assumption was utterly wrong, and the people with homes uncluttered by books, sheet music and recordings were not necessarily shallow at all. Perhaps to assume so is to confuse a particular kind of materialism for intellectual depth, which means, ironically enough, that the person who makes the assumption is being shallow.

Everyone has some shallow parts. Most people also have some deeper parts. But they aren't always in the same part of the pool.

When I was in grad school, I had an (older) roommate who, for bizarre psychological reasons connected, I think, with feelings of intellectual insecurity, fanatically collected books. He did not read them. He rarely read anything; so much so that he had difficulty passing his classes. But he had something like 3000 hardbound books in his room, mostly dealing with philosophy. Not only were all four walls lined, floor to ceiling, with homemade bookshelves, but he also had back-to-back floor-to-ceiling shelves bisecting the room, with an entryway so you could get to the other part of the room. It was maze-like, but it gave you the impression that he was a genuine intellectual because there were *so many* books, mostly on obscure philosophical topics that I certainly didn't understand. (Nor did he, since he hadn't read them).

According to him, women were very impressed by the books because they thought he was rich.

So there are all kinds of shallowness.

[sun surfer]

Nay, I doest not deplore non-readers.