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gmw · 03-12-2014, 08:30 AM

I posted the second draft (v1.1) a little earlier. There are a couple of new paragraphs that accentuate a few of things, and a couple of new sentences that I hope may clear the concerns expressed by arjaybe without disturbing what was there too much. The rest is mostly just tidy of some messy sentences (and tense issues).

Assuming I haven't broken anything too much, I'm happy to get line edit type feedback now.

03-12-2014, 08:30 AM	#122
gmw cacoethes scribendi Posts: 5,809 Karma: 137770742 Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Australia Device: Kobo Aura One & H2Ov2, Sony PRS-650	Vera's Itch I posted the second draft (v1.1) a little earlier. There are a couple of new paragraphs that accentuate a few of things, and a couple of new sentences that I hope may clear the concerns expressed by arjaybe without disturbing what was there too much. The rest is mostly just tidy of some messy sentences (and tense issues). Assuming I haven't broken anything too much, I'm happy to get line edit type feedback now.