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Old 03-14-2012, 09:51 AM   #75
mr ploppy
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Yorkshire, tha noz
Device: 2nd hand paperback
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steven Lyle Jordan View Post
I'll play: Here's my Amazon page:
http://www.amazon.com/Steven-Lyle-Jo...qid=1331731157

And while we're at it, my homepage:
http://www.RightBrane.com/StevenLyleJordan

All comments (not related to dentistry) are welcome.
The first paragraph is good, and will appeal to your target audience. But the second paragraph makes you sound like a hack writer. I think it's mainly the "banging them out on a smart phone" that's at fault here. Other writer types will understand what you mean by that, but readers will see it completely different.

As the Mirror Cracks looks interesting, I've downloaded a sample of that. It's also encouraging that you got away with using a superhero called Zenith when there's already one with the same name that's trademarked, that gives me hope for my Humpty Dumpty story.
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