[MichaelFStewart]

10. Close curtains so you don't get distracted by Russia
9. Increase vocabulary — use words like "slanket"
8. First buy yourself 100-grand worth of writing outfits
7. Don't write a word until the check clears
6. Limit yourself to one "you betcha" per chapter
5. You can never have enough stories about ice fishing or killing things with your bare hands
4. When in doubt, just type (wink)
3. Don't let writing cut into attending "Fire Letterman" rallies
2. Have a book translated for sale to European countries like London
1. "I'll try to find ya some tips and I'll bring 'em to ya!"

I thought it was hilarious.

MFS