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Old 04-23-2010, 02:33 PM   #2
Steven Lyle Jordan
Grand Sorcerer
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"No, man, no. No aliens."

"Come on, it's sci-fi. They're out in space. How can there not be aliens?"

"This is supposed to be a realistic story... not Star Trek--"

"Or Kestral."

"Shh, shh."

"--there aren't little green men hovering around every planet!"

"C'mon, Steve! Even Sagan put aliens in his book."

"Do I look like Carl Sagan?"

"He looks more like Neil Tyson to me."

"Shh, shh."

"Okay, how 'bout this: You save the aliens until the end... not as participants in the story, but just sort of like: 'Oh, look who's been watching us all this time'."

"Lame..."

"Not as lame as your Cylons."

"I never called 'em Cylons! They're called... manbots."

"Hey, can we have fembots then?"

"Lame..."

"No aliens, no robots... well, jeez, what we gonna do a sequel for?"

"How about showing the horrible aftermath of the Yellowstone Caldera? I mean, it's got to have ruined crops, choked people and animals, clogged rivers and plumbing, and stuff. Maybe there have been wars or bad riots, over food or resources. There must be a lot of people dead. Why can't we tell that story?"

...

"Oh yeah, people really want to read that!--"

"Don't you know there's a depression on?"

"Recession."

"I don't care what 'ession' it is, no one wants to read downers! We can't do that!"

"Hey! Stop spraying doughnuts!"

"No, it's gotta be a war! They come back for resources, and the Earthlings fight them for control of Verdant."

"What else, from the X-Box guy?"

"Oh! But maybe the Verdant guys have learned special powers that allowed them to live in space... like being able to command the elements with kung-fu motions, or travel in spirit-bodies!"

"What else, from the anime guy?"

"Can't we have Anise Lenz meet back up with her guy Sergei?"

"What else, from the Harlequin guy?"

"My name is Donna..."

"Well, maybe if you let your hair grow..."

"Mondo lameness! Listen, if you guys can't come up with anything better than this, I'm not gonna touch it! I need another frapp..."

"Hey, wait! You can't leave yet, Steve!"

"Why not?"

"'Cos you don't have my order! Get me a grande iced cafe mocha."

"I'll have a white chocolate mocha frapp... venti, please."

"Isn't there a size bigger than 'venti' now?"

"Get me a tall half-caf double-soy espresso with room!"

"Yeah... it's called 'ginomini', or something..."

"Grande dark cherry mocha frapp... those things are great..."

"Yeah, two of those!"

"sigh..."
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