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Old 08-23-2012, 03:48 PM   #39
twowheels
Wizard
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I may read the sample to get a better idea, but haven't had a chance yet.

That said, here's my honest feedback so far:

- The web page doesn't appeal to me. Reminds me of when we first started hand coding pages prior to the general public finding their way onto the Internet. The clock and visit counter add to that impression, and I wouldn't be surprised to encounter an animated "under construction" gif somewhere.

- I find your writing style on the forum somewhat difficult to read. I agree that one takes a different approach to writing long form and on forums, but IME, good communicators [a group to which I do not claim to belong] are good at both formats. I see simple errors repeated that indicate a lack of attention to detail [e.g. its vs. it's]. Yes, a good editor can help with that, but I imagine a certain minimal starting point.

- The cover art has the same early 90s and amateur feel as the website.

Admittedly, none of these have anything to do with the quality of the story. I do personally find the premise to be interesting, even if similar things have been done before. It's a topic that seems to have a lot of potential for exploration, with a lot of variation in reactions and exploration of the moral implications of those reactions. For those reasons, I might consider reading it if I find myself wanting a change of pace from my usual reading.
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