I'm a mother of 2 boys and have been abused myself (by both a man, a woman, and 2 teenage boys). I watch people very carefully but I don't think I go overboard. I make sure I don't leave my kids alone with ANYONE that I don't trust, whether it's male, female or another kid.
My husband is not my childrens father, but he's as close as you could get without being blood related and I have never thought twice about leaving him with my boys, even before we were married. My husband loves babies and toddlers, he laughs and makes faces at them when we're out and so far I haven't had a problem with anyone giving him dirty looks. I've had many men talk to my kids on the elevator in my building, to say hi or ask how they like school and only once was I ever concerned. The guy that I had a problem with knelt down to them and was about 6 inches from their faces and just the look in his eyes made me feel sick. At that point I didn't care if I was being rude, I stepped in between and told him not to even breathe in my childrens direction or he was going to lose his teeth.
What bothers me in today's world are the amount of girls/women that make false claims just so they can get attention or revenge. I've heard so many stories from men about their ex girlfriends talling police they hit them or assaulted them when it wasn't true. It makes me sick to know how many women/kids are out there that feel like they can't speak out and these b**ches get away with putting innocent men in jail because they didn't want to be with a psycho anymore.
There are some really screwed up people out there, you just have to trust your own instincts.